10:17 PM
Hello.
Yay.
Well, I’m just, uh,
Laying here and staring up at the ceiling. Haha. I got, uh, sucked into like a The Facebook reels. Yeah, that whole thing for about an hour watching, dumb crap.
And reading the comments. It’s like,
8 billion people on this Earth.
It just, I know everybody has their purpose and their roles to play. And you know, everybody has their special place in life and this whole thing. But
It’s really hard sometimes to read what people comment.
On anything.
I think what started, it was a video of Angus Young, talking about some crap. And that’s what’s been popping up a lot. What actually does pop up a lot is uh, Like fucking Metallica stuff and mega death, but it’s like it’s interesting for some reason to me because I used to be into this shit when I was a kid.
And watching old, like clips of interviews from Dave Mustaine And fucking Lars, you know,
Little turd is what he is and everybody just talks about what a shitty drummer and you know he kind of He’s not the best, you know, at all. And, uh, a lot of what’s been popping up lately has been Van Halen stuff. And I’ve never been a Van Halen fan, but he is a really great, you know, or was, uh, guitar player like really, really great.
I just always hated their fucking singer, like, all of them, what do they had? Uh,
David Lee Roth. Who’s just a fucking idiot. And, uh, the guy after him was just lame as hell.
And didn’t they have the guy from extreme try to sing for them once or something? I don’t remember it and it might not have been him. I don’t know why that popped in my head, but that band sucked too.
You know, another band I used to love the music. I mean I just loved their music but I always they never had a good singer was Anthrax. Yeah.
God. I mean,
My pal. I really it’s kind of hard to still call him that Eric, you know, is, uh, He’s into all that shit like he never grew out of it, like I did.
And I say like grew out of it is they put out like you know all the metal and stuff in the 80s they put out their best stuff then And then they just kind of, you know,
Like artistically just lost it.
But people still loved the, you know, the brand or whatever. I mean, that’s all it really was.
After a point. So they still you know it’s like they still drink Coke or something and even though it’s
It’s just, it’s like Whatever another group band or whatever, uh, is Tool.
And that has just gotten like I used to think that and they were, they were like 1 of the most innovative. Progressive like no, nobody ever sounded like them. Especially on the album undertow and I was a huge tool fan, I’ve been to 2 concerts. I’ve met all of them. Except Adam Jones. He never came out. Uh, but like
What a fucking retarded douchebag Maynard Turned out to be, huh? Yeah, like what It makes me cringe, I can’t even say, like the stuff that he’s, you know, involved with now. I loved. Loved. Yeah, I guess I could say that about 2/3 of that first A Perfect Circle album. Yeah, um, because it, you know, it had some cheesy shit in it. I couldn’t even get past the first song on the second album and I don’t know what they’ve done since then. I tried to listen to the guitar player that Billy howerdel guy. Yeah. However, you spell his last name, um,
And it was just,
So,
Just boring, you know.
But I love a lot of the textures and stuff that he used.
Uh, Man, a lot of just crap about Tool. But it’s because you know they hit like a certain point, they got this huge loyal fan base, you know, but What that’s what really killed it for me with tool is they stopped being Innovative artistically and like, you know, they just were jacking off all this fucking
How do I? Where are the words in my brain? Um,
They just were regurgitating, a bunch of fucking new age bullshit, you know, it’s like,
Just, you know, it’s
It makes people feel smart to listen to it. Yeah.
Like, you know, if if you get it or whatever if you don’t, you just don’t get it. Yeah, that’s kind of that kind of thing. I mean, like what Pink Floyd turned into but it was just Corporate rock. They marketed themselves as some deep shit, and of course people bought it. Haha
And to go back and you know, and listen to like the lyrics and stuff. You know, Tool’s lyrics in the 90s especially, you know, they’re dumb. It’s like something a 13 year old would come up with and try to mask it as this deep crazy stuff, but it’s just about fingering buttholes but the music totally was and he is, you know, a really great singer too. I mean, It’s just, I don’t know. I’m just thinking about it kind of like God, I used to be so stupid. I was a stupid fucking teenager. Just like everybody else was, you know,
Haha.
Haha. Yeah, I mean, like But he did like the song hooker with the penis, you know? It’s uh
I used to talk to like me and my friends would stay up talking about this shit like it was you know something deep and important. It’s like you know, he’s just
He basically was just, you know, it’s just his job, you know, and he makes the stuff and he makes money and it’s everything’s a product.
And and Tool was. No different. Yeah. It’s like
I mean it’s art and stuff but that only goes so far.
And a lot of groups. Anyways, I mean, they do they they hit a certain level of success and the Conditions, you know that were present.
Uh at the time where that facilitated their fucking creativity just changed. And that happens that’s actually really normal. To have. Happened to A band after you know, 2 or 3 albums. It’s like
I’m trying to think of a band. Who, who consistently puts out good music.
You know, past 3 albums. And I can’t think of anything off the top of my head.
Sometimes I feel like I’ve hit that point, but then I’ve, I’ve felt that way before and then something will Come out of nowhere and I’ll just have this creative. Burst
Like um, After the divorce, I was just like dead inside and then I met my ex fiance and that got 2 songs and a whole bunch of art. And then, um, you know, it was I went through a period where I just couldn’t write anything. I couldn’t come up with anything and then uh, that supervisor chick who stalked me, I ended up getting a song out of that. And that was like, Hey, you know, and I mean that was
About a year and a half Gap there. I made up a song about this chick. I worked with, um, At Newman but it’s really stupid and I’ll never play it for anybody unless I’m like, unless I record it. To like put to something to make fun of it. I don’t know.
Uh, haha
But then about a year not even maybe 8 months after I made up that song the chick’s name was Bryana, after I made that song up and it’s 1 of my best songs. I get mixed up with Stephanie and that just unleashes my fucking creativity. And that.
That’s still ongoing. Not about her, but I leveled up as a musician after that. Then the second car factory happened and I leveled up again. Haha Actually, I don’t know, I’ve just been in a slump the last couple of months. Because I came up with some really cool songs at the warehouse job last year towards the end of the year.
But yeah, I mean
I don’t know.
A lot of bands just run their course. You know, I just I haven’t like, you know, I still only have Well, I have a probably
It’s hard to say how many songs I actually have made up because there’s a lot of stuff that I’ll never like, get out and perform with the stuff that I will. Of, you know, I do like performing in front of people because
Uh anyways. Yeah about I’ve got about 40. 40 songs. Do I really have that many though? I mean, maybe 30. That I would actually perform live. And then there are all the crazy ass fucking songs. I made up about the dogs and, kids, pretty much anything else uh, co-workers get I make up.
You know, half a dozen, co-worker songs, at least. Usually, at any job, I don’t know what I’m talking about. I just mean, like, a lot of bands, I was trying to relate that to myself. You know, I haven’t really felt like doing a lot of music since my mom died. That really just that was
That got all into my brains earlier and kind of fucked my mood up. It’s like
I just don’t feel like my mom deserved to die like that, it was really bad. I was hoping everything was getting better.
My mom deserved, you know, to
Be okay. And Be happy and just live, you know, I know she was getting older and everything.
I really noticed.
A huge difference in her after they moved us to the Corner Apartment like after she got out of the apartment, she had been in for 15 years, but like the roof the uh, had a hole in it or some shit and it leaked down. That. That place had a lot of problems, I don’t know, because it was, it’s 132
- Something years old? Yeah, I don’t remember exactly. But um,
Ended up like, leaking down like from uh,
The ceiling anyway. So there was a lot of mold and shit, uh, on the walls and stuff. And especially in the room, I slept in And,
It was going to take too much to renovate it. Uh, with us living in there, they couldn’t do it with us staying there and this lady died. She had lived there for gosh. 30 something years, she was 89, and she died and like, all that kind of happened around the same time. And they were like, well, we can just move you into the this other apartment if that’s okay. And At first, it was awesome. But because the kitchen was bigger and You know, a lot of stuff, but I don’t know. I noticed a huge change in mom but it happened. Kind of gradually over about a year. And then, you know,
Everything that happened to me in 2023. You know, and so on like I just it got worse and worse with her like it Really started around the holidays. In 2023 Or that’s when I took notice of it
I’m trying to think because all I did was work like everything just zipped by And then all of a sudden like my mom just gets more and more erratic and It was really hard to deal with and we end up getting kicked out. She got us kicked out
I don’t know. That was just that’s why I haven’t really felt like doing any music. I haven’t felt like doing music today either and I have like all day long to do it. I just got drunk and I was only drunk for a little bit and now it’s like I can’t get drunk again. It’s kind of funny. It took a lot of wind out of my sails when my uh character got thrown in jail. And he’s he’ll be in there till tomorrow. The next server reset is uh like tomorrow night. So it’s it’s not going to be that bad but dang it.
10:34 PM
All I Wanted to do was Yeah, that’s all I wanted to do is just get drunk and play. Never winter nights.
And stay up all night long, playing it. And now I don’t get to And I tried I tried so hard to make new characters and I just can’t go back through the whole shit and level myself. Back up it it takes too long.
I made a.
A druid and I was just like, dang you know, it’s just takes too long and then I made a fucking
A fat elf Barbarian and that was, you know,
Taking too long. It’s like I just invested too much into him. It’s like now. I only want to if I can’t play my gnome character, I just that’s the game for me. Nowadays or right? What Now yeah, forever, I guess. I don’t know, I’m just not interested in playing any other characters, it’s just like it’s him or you know. He’ll be out of jail tomorrow.
I don’t know, I don’t care that much about video games. Like I used to either. It’s
It’s just something fun for me to do. It does help because I get to interact with like real people and That’s actually what got me thrown in jail. Yeah, but ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Yeah.
I don’t know, that’s going to take a lot of uh, his backstory is really complicated. He was raised by elves but his mom was a gnome. And she put a spell on an elf.
Man.
To make him fall in love with her and so he married her and then he got like in a lot of crap because it wasn’t socially respected and so like and then he hated, you know, me and my sister. And my sister was eaten by goblins all this crazy shit. I don’t know. They ate her butt first in front of him. I mean, and that’s why he hates goblins. His favored enemy is a Gob is the goblins. And uh, I tell that story to people and
I was married to a dwarf. He was married to a dwarf. I don’t know first or third person or whatever. Haha Yeah, it was, it’s just something fun. It’s another creative outlet for me to play as this crazy Little Gnome.
And this dwarf chick like showed up like earlier today and uh it reminded him of his wife. And she died during childbirth. Because like gnomes and dwarves, the baby was all messed up and it killed her and killed the baby. And so he took that Dwarf chick on a shopping spree and gave her like 10,000 gold. She was really happy but he ran away because he started crying too hard
I mean it gets pretty complicated, I just go nuts, you know, with the story with his, you know,
Life, I guess. But he’s not, you know, he’s not a villain. Like he was in on the Erithorn’s might servers. Yeah.
I don’t know what else can I say. I’m just I think I have about half a cigarette.
Uh, outside in the ashtray, I’m going to probably Probably smoke that. And
I bought so much food delicious food, though like
I spent way too much money.
I got this big loaf of sourdough bread. And it’s crunchy, you know, on the top but fucking gnats got into it.
I don’t know how much that matters though.
I only really I only saw 1. You know, they used to get into my stuff all the time at The Farmhouse.
Well.
I guess I’m going to wrap this up and, uh,
I downloaded a bunch of really cool like GIFs. However, you want to say that? Yeah, um,
I can use this background. And I’m going to, I’m going to use 1 of the new ones.
Thank you. Please.
MY BLOG NUMBER SEVEN 