2:38 PM
Oh my goodness.
I’m having a rough time. Yeah. I made a post earlier but I made it private. I just went off about
A bunch of crap. Yep.
Mostly how I’ve had like several.
Really sweet ladies. Come my way in the last couple of years and I ran from all of them because of the Twin Flame chick. I ran from her too, but She did a bunch of fucked up mean shit to me. Which made it all so much worse and I just went off about it. It’s like God.
I’m not running from Love Again.
And sometimes I’m just like,
Well, you know, the kids Are the only reason I don’t just Straight up fucking kill myself
And it’s been like this for years, you know, in my brain, it’s like,
Just I’m so messed up. I don’t relate to people, I can’t connect with people anymore.
Right now, I’m just exhausted because night shift is different.
I have to wait on my roommate until like 7:00 a.m. to pick me up and
It’s hard. Yeah.
I’m just up there for about 3 hours after I clock out and it’s like, I can’t sleep. You know, really. I went to the gym for a little bit, but I was so tired when I got off work this morning.
Yeah, I don’t know, it’s just like, all right, I get paid today but
Still going to take me another month, at least. To save up like anywhere close to enough for a down payment on something decent.
Think. I think, yeah.
This is dumb, it is just dumb, my whole life and it could be so much worse.
I wonder if we are going to work this weekend, I don’t know. People were talking about it.
On 1 hand, I need the money on the other. I need the rest.
But I did eat hot dogs this morning after work, and I got a little drunk, and that’s why I went off. And then after I woke up, I woke up about an hour ago. I was like God I have to make that post private. Hopefully nobody saw it and they didn’t so well 1 person, they were from WordPress. I mean, nobody from like, Facebook, Or somebody stalking my shit. Haha
Yeah, that happens. Like you never know who’s going to stumble upon this. My exwife finally stopped stalking my blogs. I mean just because, you know, I don’t get any regular hits from people outside of WordPress. Doesn’t mean it won’t happen. It’s really funny sometimes when it does, but
I don’t know.
I don’t really think I’m going to find a girlfriend at work though, but I really wish I had 1. I’ve been single for 4 years and it’s like, Okay, you know.
I don’t have to be but then I haven’t.
I haven’t really met anybody.
Well, I have but I haven’t. What am I even trying to say?
I get lonely.
And that sucks. But
I don’t know. I’m going to try to get the kids this weekend at some point, like
I’m either going to rent a car. My roommate was like, uh, her partner.
I could borrow maybe their car. Yeah.
She’s having this big crazy party Saturday night and I just, I’m not really sure I want to Be here for that. Haha Yeah. I mean it’s kind of funny but I really miss my kids more than anything. And if I saw them on a regular basis, Like it wouldn’t be, I wouldn’t be complaining so much if I had a car, you know, and stuff.
I guess really after the divorce and then even more, like I just haven’t felt that great about myself.
What’s up? Hey Morty. How are you? I’m okay. I just woke up.
You have a good day. Are you too have fun? It’s a beautiful day, it is.
1 of my roommates just came outside. I think he’s going to work or something.
Um,
I just can’t bring myself to eat another sandwich. I’ve got. Lots of Sandwich stuff.
Ugh.
It is the really nice day.
It is a really nice day. I said,
I guess really. I just wanted to keep up my post Streak. I think it’s like 12 days now.
But yeah. Supposed to get like a bonus next month, 2 months, so maybe all that stuff will I’ll be able to get a car at least towards the end of next month or the beginning of June and time. Just Zips past.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my whole life like,
Just how different everything is, you know. And it’s like
Jesus.
My brains hurt.
My brains. Yeah, thanks.
Well, I guess I’m going to go upstairs and get a shower and
Go to work. Yep.
Thank you, please.
MY BLOG NUMBER SEVEN 