MONDAY! AGAIN

8:29 PM
Hello. Yeah.

Well, I am just

Hungry again, isn’t that funny?

No. Should have gotten cornbread, haha.

Haha.

Oh shit. I had this crazy dream.

Last night that, uh, These ants, these little bitty ants from space, came to Earth and was crawling up people’s noses into their brains and turnt them into these like not people. Yeah, I just like you know they weren’t people, they were like

Controlled. Yeah, by the ants, but they were like they were like zombies. But they weren’t It was creepy scary that. It was like. What’s that? Yeah the Body Snatchers movie kind of like that it was fucking weird and I had to kill like all of them.

And uh, but like I had to smash their faces and get the ants, find the ants in their heads. And kill the ants. A little ants. I had to cut them in half with a fucking knife. And it was the most stressful ass dream. I’ve had In a long time and sometimes I do, I have dreams like that. Like like

You know, some kind of survival horror movie themed dreams of the varying like insanity. 1 time. I had this dream where I was on a boat. And the uh, there were all these crazy like

Entities.

Like coming out of the water and in through time and other dimensions and I had to travel between dimensions and Like fight them and talk to them

Just like huge things and it was real as shit in my dream, like it was just like I’m laying here. Now, blabbering, Making a blog post. It was as real as this haha.

Um, but that’s another thing too. I had to like I got on a boat in this dream. I had last night too

Yeah, I don’t know. Something about boats and docks. I was like on this pier and I had to Like run out to boats and start the boat. And there were people on the boat and I thought, and that’s what sucked is. I, I defeated all the ants and all the stuff and all the people You know, I saved the Earth, right?

But then they came back like a week later and

There was this girl who liked me and I liked her too, but She was fine. You know, she played the violin and we were all like talking and stuff and she like went outside.

It was this old like,

Like wooden house and it had a screen like a screened in back porch and she went on the back porch. Yeah, the house was all like gray, you know, and like old wood colored

And uh, she came back. She was like, I dropped my violin, but she had this weird voice and I knew she had been taken by the ants And like it, this part was kind of weird. She like came back up the steps and she looked at me and she’d bent over and like she like Dropped her pants down And showed me her butt. She was trying to trick me and I was like, no fucking way. And I stabbed her and the kidneys and cut her head off and smashed her head, open with a hammer and, uh, the ant crawled out, it was like, 3 ants and they crawled out of her brain. And I had to take a, I took like my knife, I had this special knife, and it was really just like a fucking kitchen knife. Like a butchering knife kind of thing, but it wasn’t that big

And I had to cut the ants in half, and I had to do this with everybody. Like I had to smash their heads open and the Ants would run out and I would cut the ants like in half and that’s the only way I could kill. You could stop them. They were like, you know, 2 or 3 ants in every person

Oh God, and I woke up. I just I’m finally just made myself wake up. I was like, fuck this dream. It was crazy. I was telling, uh, this co-worker about that dream today, actually. He’s like, yeah, I’ve had dreams like that it’s like

It’s like you don’t really get any rest and you wake up fucking exhausted. I was like, yeah, exactly. Exactly what I did. I woke up more tired than I was when I went to sleep. Haha

It was funny though. At least. Now I have like a written record of it, right?

Or something.

Dreams can be so crazy. Sometimes I have nightmares but not very often. Usually, in my Dreams. If it’s like, if it goes that direction, I can fuck it up. Like I can, you know, it’s not that big of a deal. I’ve actually made some posts. About dreams before in my other blog that I’ve had just crazy ass dreams. That more things got really crazy. That would

Be a nightmare but like

Um,

I end up, you know.

Overcoming it, but then there’s like this recurring dream. I’ve had a couple times and I’m actually starting to feel kind of weird talking about it. There’s this. Man or thing or something? Oh yeah, gosh, he’s got like a white head and he wears a hat.

A white head. Yeah, and he wears a hat, like a white like round head Without a Face. And I know. Oh my goodness. What is that? Yeah. I’m starting to feel all tingly. I don’t understand. Haha. But uh, sometimes I’ll have dreams about him and he’ll come in to like

My uh, dreams and it scares the shit out of me. I mean I always wake up going like, hey, you know cuz I’m trying to like

Fix it. I don’t know what that is. It’s some kind of ghost. Or spirit?

I don’t know if that’s something I picked up in The Farmhouse. I don’t know. Yeah, like I had a dream about it. I’ve had some crazy dreams.

Or if it’s like something.

In me or around me.

Because I did I got really tingly feeling.

And it’s coming in. Yeah, it’s weird. What the hell even is that, you know, like what is, what is it, you know?

But it is. It’s like the only. It’s like, the only scary thing I’ve had dreams about, and it doesn’t seem scary, but it feels scary. Yeah, it’s not like it doesn’t look.

As scary as it feels, but I had a dream about it in the apartment. Uh, when we lived in the, my mom’s original apartment. And it might have been something I’ve picked up there because that, uh,

Apartment building was 130 something years old, you know? At the time I think it was like 132 years old.

But I had a dream about that.

Oh gosh, It had to have been back in January or February in my other room.

In this house. Yeah, I don’t remember. It did, it came back for it came like in here for a second. Now, it’s gone. But yeah, I’m just like thinking about it and I was just start to fill all tingly. I wonder what the hell that even is?

It’s like a, he’s like, like dressed in like a trench coat.

Like a black trench coat with like a tie like something out of the, like a Like a detective. Story or something. But he has a white face. Like a white like a mannequin. Almost. Yeah. It’s kind of crazy but I never can see his face and most of the time I only see him from the back. It’s just it it’s like this really crazy tingly, Eerie feeling that I’m feeling a part like part of it right now. God I hope. I don’t dream about it tonight. Oh my God. Haha shit

Oh my goodness, whatever, whatever it is. I wonder what it is.

Crazy.

But yeah, he’s got like a hat, like a

You know, like a gangster hat. I guess maybe that’s what he was, or is

I wonder where he comes from. I wonder why me. Yeah.

And he has a briefcase.

This it is God, I’m just all tingly feeling like So crazy.

I wonder if it follows me around.

What does it mean?

But I’ve had like encounters with paranormal things my whole life. It’s I don’t ever think about it that much anymore, you know, because I’m so tired.

From working all the time, but Like back in the day like I would just it would that shit would be everywhere.

Um,

I don’t know. I don’t know why that has why that’s so like terrifying. It’s like paralyzing, like fear, it’s crazy.

It’s like, really. It’s the only thing. It’s the only thing that’s ever like been able to do that. To me is just this guy like with a white mannequin head in A in like a gangster looking suit from like the 30s or 40s. Carrying a briefcase. Yeah. And sometimes he’s like, accompanied by like something else, like person that I can’t really make out because it’s always like, I’m trying to like Follow it. You know, but it’s scary. But I’m just like, hey, like what are you? What is it? It’s For real. Yeah. And I’m I’m feeling the same shit right now. It’s insane.

I wonder where it comes from.

I don’t know like Paranormal things talking about that. The Twin Flame thing was like,

Insanely paranormal like that. And it is. It’s a paranormal just overuse that word, right? But it is. Totally like a fucking.

Supernatural thing.

And I talked to people who were like, oh, I’ve had a twin flame and all this stuff and they tell me about the relationship and it was real intense. And chaotic  And Just, you know, but It’s like yeah. Well do you have a psychic link with them? Can you feel their fucking thoughts and their emotions? You know, and then they look at me, like I’m insane. It’s like, yeah, you don’t have a twin flame. You know.

Do they get in your brain and Like, tell, tell you stuff and Do they scare the living fucking hell out of you can, can you get within 5 feet of them without shaking like a crazy person? And

Feel this like,

Intense.

Nervousness in the pit of your stomach? Then you don’t have a twin flame like yeah. It’s insanity.

It’s the craziest 1 of the craziest thing that’s ever happened to me and it’s so funny too and I don’t talk about it. Like in detail like that with just anybody.

But yeah, I guess, you know, it’s like There’s a the whole lot outside of just this, you know, regular

Existence that everybody just kind of shares, you know.

A lot of people get lost in. TV and you know, movies or shows or whatever the fuck people do for entertainment. It hasn’t changed much in

50 years, you know, video games are a big thing, people. People get lost in those. I’ve actually well, I don’t talk to her that much anymore, but About a month or so ago. I started talking to this chick I can’t even remember where she came from on my friends list. But she um she’s a huge gamer and that’s like she just lives in that world.

My friend Eric’s like that too. So you know, speaking of him in the last post just lives inside of video games, that’s his whole reality.

But, you know, relatively few people actually like dared to venture out into the

8:45 PM
You know, beyond. Yeah, the Beyond Beyond the Beyond, like the Fucking uh, Whether men album. Yeah, the weatherman.

The weather men album. I’m not going to post a link to that.

You know.

It’s so funny too because I was I used to be all into like Paranormal stuff. And I would astral travel and project myself into these all this crazy shit I played with a dead girl like her ghost. Like she had suffocated in a fire. Oh, it was so crazy too. Oh there was this old like chimney thing that used to be like uh 1 of my great. Like I don’t think it, it wasn’t my great-grandparents. It was like 1 of their 1 of my great, great aunts, or uncles, or something in the ruins of this house. And she was um she was their daughter and she suffocated and she was like 3. She got too close to the fire. Apparently that was Fairly. Common thing. And uh yeah her ghost was like, it was so weird but I was like, hey,

And uh yeah, that happened the past life.

Flashbacks. I’ve had, oh my gosh, I took that as far as I could take it too You know, people don’t you don’t meet a lot of people who who are like for real into that shit into actually doing real things with it.

That’s, I guess stuff like that. It’s like, you know, after you

It’s really hard to relate. Yeah. To people who you know, it’s like you know there’s like This is oh I don’t even know where to start. Yeah, it’s crazy. It’s just and then all the research I did with project Odin.

Which Eric was a part of but, you know, he just showed up

Him and Casey. They were more like additional instruments, or conduits really

I don’t know, I made a big post about that. I can’t remember if it was in this blog or the other 1.

Maybe I should.

Get back into that stuff. I don’t know. The divorce. That was something else too, you know.

That really?

I was just spacing out thinking. Yeah it’s like gosh. I don’t really want to go off too far about this because I’ll get all animated and loud. And

I don’t know. I don’t think it really matters.

But at the same time, it’s like, whatever.

Just thinking. Thinking about that, crazy dream, I had, you know, last night, triggered all that shit. But I did, I had an endoscopy procedure. Done in 2014 when I was having problems with my gallbladder. And uh,

Like, whatever, they gave me to knock me out sent me into this fucking place where I was, uh, in a tank. Um, the best I could figure I was French. I was speaking French. Like it was funny. And I was in a tank and I was like, it felt like the year, like 1940. And I was, uh,

Just hanging out in the tank, you know?

And all of a sudden this like, you know, those German grenades they have like the can on the top and the wooden handle thing, that thing just came bopping in through the Yeah, through the hatch. And I was like, you know, merde you know The word for shit. I was just like, oh my God. And, uh, I was like, like, just all rushed to grab it and I picked it up and right, as I was throwing it out the top, you know, of the tank it exploded and blew the tank up and I died. How fucking guts is sucked right back into my body?

And my mom was there and my ex-wife was there. And I woke up hysterical like slobbering and crying and shit like oh my God, all this fucking, I couldn’t believe what had happened because I was there, you know? And I died and then I was back in my body. Like you know, in 2014 in the hospital and uh the doctor came in there and he was like telling my ex-wife he was like, your husband is a very, very strong man. And she’s like, what do you mean? You know, and I did have I had bruises all over me too. Apparently I was thrashing around so much when they did that. That 5 nurses. Had to sit on me and hold me down and took 5, people to hold me down while they stuck, you know, the thing down my throat, and up my butt. And um, yeah. That happened and my mom was there and she was like, you know, cuz I was telling her it’s like you know, all the stuff is real everything. You know, past lives death. God, the Light. You know, all that shit. It’s like

It’s all real. And I was just blabbering a bunch of crazy stuff. And that’s what started like my.

Interest, I guess in all that crap for real

But that’s kind of the thing about the Twin Flame chick too, is her and I were a lot of things in past lives.

And, uh, I don’t know.

Without going, I mean it’s all in the songs and stuff, but it’s like crap, you know? Here’s somebody that I’ve Found in almost every single Lifetime and you know, I found her in this lifetime and I freaked out and ran away from her but I couldn’t help it. And that triggered this Cascade of just

Shit, back down into the, you know, void again.

But uh gosh what a bunch of crazy shit, huh? Yeah, all that stuff does it gets? You can really drive yourself nuts with all that junk.

Oh, I guess that’s kind of 1 thing, why? I haven’t been messing with it that much. It’s like You know, normal waking reality is just fine sometimes.

Sure is

Just laying here in the Darkness.

Get a good night’s sleep, get up and work a whole bunch and eat well and be like, yeah.

Drink. You know.

Coffee.

Record some crazy music that you can’t do. The I guess with the same logic, you know, that I don’t get all animated and get into the specifics of some of that crazy shit. Is also why I don’t do the vocals here for the songs that I’ve come up with.

I’ve Got the Music recorded, you know to to several of them. But, Yeah, I’ll have to do the Vocals in my storage unit, probably,

Well shit, this is turning into a long-winded post.

Kind of stirred up my brains a little bit like hope. I don’t have any too crazy fucking dreams tonight.

Cuz I mean, you know,

I guess that’s the 1 reason why uh,

Well, I want to talk about that but I’m not going to talk about anything too negative.

I just spent like, you know, last year, was Really really, really hard.

Thank you, please.