SUNDAY NIGHT

8:15 PM
Well, hey there. What have I done?

Hot dogs, but then I had to lay down for. About 30 minutes. I’ve been trying to make a post. For the last 4 or 5 hours, it was like, Sunday afternoon, and then that turned into Sunday evening. And Now, it’s Sunday night. So

Yeah. About 5 different times.

I just wanted to make another Sunday post.

It’s crazy. How When you have time off at, uh, When you have, Time off. Yeah. It just It’s gone already.

Of course, it’s the same thing at work over and over and over, huh?

What a life?

Well.

I enjoy. Monotonous factory work because I don’t stress out about it.

Nope, it’s just

A lot on my body sometimes. But overall, it’s pretty good.

I say that now because I haven’t had any and I really kind of overdid it last night. But, you know, alcohol and stuff but

I really Need to stop drinking and smoking.

And talking about crazy shit in my blog.

Yeah.

I just I’m ready to be passed. All of that and have like a future again.

I want to.

Be happy and enjoy life and

Not be.

Sad and tired all the time and that doesn’t happen. Unless I drink.

Yeah, I mean I’ve been pretty good though. This the last week because you know, I’m off work. I don’t have to

Do anything? I don’t want to like I can just lay down while I’m tired.

But,

Yeah, I remember I think it was last week. I didn’t drink for 3 or 4 days. Week before last. Yeah, and I started to feel great.

I don’t know why I started drinking again. I think The Weeknd happened. Yeah.

I hope they fix the internet.

Soon. The truck was out there, the

Technicians or whatever. But

They left. They were there for about 30 minutes and then left.

And never came back and the internet still isn’t working.

I also got a half gallon. No, I’ve drank.

Half of this gallon of Arizona, green tea.

A little more than half now. Yeah.

I was laying here though, thinking

Just like,

The last couple days I’ve really been thinking about my mom. And it’s like we know I did everything I could

I still feel like I feel bad.

When I think about my mom, And I have no idea. We were supposed to have a memorial service or something. And my sister either had it and didn’t tell me about it. Or hasn’t done anything yet. And I don’t understand.

Families are crazy things.

They can be. Talk about drama?

Yeah.

Sometimes though, I miss

I miss the whole family thing. I don’t have it anymore, it used to be everywhere, you know. When I was younger up until really, I got divorced. Yeah, I had a family of my own I don’t think I’ll ever get over that. Like, losing all that, the way I did, and

Gosh, it’s hard. It’s been really hard. Um,

Especially, I mean this is like I’ve got to get on with my life though. But I do think about, like, How? An active role like my family, my dad’s side of the family and everything, how everybody used to be

And then, uh,

I just don’t feel like a part of that anymore.

A lot of that’s because of my dad.

You know, it’s weird because my dad just does not like me as a person.

And I can’t say, well, actually the fact that he doesn’t

Makes me not like him because It’s stupid. And I still can’t believe though, like looking back that I was ever. In business with him or ever even like

Anything.

But I wonder what the future holds.

I’ve been, you know, practicing stuff my music a lot this past week. And, uh, you know, it would be cool to get out and start doing that again.

I still get burned out though on my songs. I need to Make it up more words for some of them. And write new ones too. But I have came up with a few pretty good ones lately.

The staying here is like half the dang year is like half over. Pretty much.

Already half over. What a What a year? It has been.

You know, I should probably get a shower. I bet that would make me feel better.

Thank you, please.