MONDAY NIGHT

9:43 PM
Hey there.

What am I doing?

Just finished, uh, most of my chores. Yeah yeah.

Haha. I said, yeah funny and it Picked it up twice, anyways.

Shit, what the hell even what was my last post?

Oh yeah. Anyways, my daughter sent me some reels on

Uh, Instagram, it was funny. This guy playing saxophone through A piece of bread and then um, guitar through a kiwi. Haha

Silly.

Um, Crap, my last post I talked about

Oh yeah. I fixed the sink. Well. The kids helped too. Especially my daughter.

We were at Lowe’s for a second time and my daughter was like, this sucks. So she just grabbed a part and she was like here dad and it was the correct part. It was like cuz I was looking through all the crap and she just like looked over to the side and reached in 1 of the shelves and pulled this thing out and handed it to me and it was exactly what I needed. To finish the uh, the sink. It was. A, it was like a flexible P trap. It was plastic and it just it fit right over the The drain on both sides, and I used this little uh, rubber coupling that I had bought that I thought

Okay.

Yeah, I guess the Wi-Fi glitched out. Yeah, that I had thought would initially fix it. But the galvanized part was too. Corroded. And, So it didn’t fix it, haha.

But anyways, it’s fixed now. Yay. And

Uh first day back from night shift today was not so bad.

My shoulder’s, killing me though. I don’t know what the fuck.

I was going uh, pretty great with the gym until I took all the PTO back in June and July. And uh, I just Stopped working out and never got back. I’ve been in like for 2 months straight. I had been working out like just kicking its ass.

And then, uh,

I stopped and I just haven’t built myself back up. I worked out last week. And the week before and I don’t know, I don’t really

It’s discouraging, I guess a little bit y’all and uh,

Uh, shaved my I shaved my beard off. It’s been a fucking 3 weeks ago or something and then it grew back. And I shaved that off and I got a haircut and I look really retarded. Right now.

Although I have gotten a lot of compliments at work. People just came up to me and was like, oh gosh, we love your haircut. And I’m like, thanks.

I don’t know. Ever since my birthday, I have felt different about Everything

Um,

I think I talked about this in another post maybe last week.

Uh, I’ve already, you know, like freaked out and ran away so much from helmet girl that um,

Yeah, she thinks I’m an asshole or at least maybe she did. I tried to talk to her on my birthday. I was like, hey, I like your helmet and she ignored me and I deserved it I guess but like I don’t know. I keep seeing her. And we always make eye contacts, and it’s like, It’s actually kind of funny.

But we never like, I don’t know. Um, I saw her today at lunch, she went to the restroom and came back, and she looked right into my break room and I looked at her like, and but she kept walking and I was walking in. Uh, there’s a considerable distance between where she was walking and the break room though. It was like she was looking to see if I was in there And, So I was like, well, you know what? Next break I’m going to go over there to where she, where the restroom is on her side of the It’s kind of hard to explain like I usually go, she works. A few lines down from me on some offline process. And uh,

Like she goes to this other place like there’s snack machines and a restroom and the water fountain stuff. Uh, Close to hers, her break room and then there’s 1 that’s close to my line. My break room’s actually kind of far from my line

Uh, It’s it’s I don’t know but I decided I’d go over to where her’s was at on last break and she either saw me or didn’t care or something but I didn’t see her. Usually I see her. If I go over there, like I tried to talk to her over there 1 time and she ignored me, but this was after, you know, I freaked out and ran away like the few times. I guess it’s been a few times. Yeah that I’ve I should have talked to her like she would look at me and smile and stuff.

But I’m just I was like oh my God and I, I was just freaked the hell out.

So, who knows? Yeah, I mean, I don’t know her name or anything every time I pass by Her. I always look at her face and I don’t, I never think to look at her name. On her shirt because I’m like gosh, she’s just so pretty. Yeah, it’s really funny.

I’m also probably twice her age and that’s another thing. It’s like, you know, it’s really hard for me to be retarded. Again for anybody right? At least right now, I just I’m just like, man.

I really, really have in the past though, especially like at the Honda plant. I mean, that was that right there was like the

I don’t really know a good way to put that without sounding even more stupid.

That took the cake. Yeah, at least I mean I’m just like gosh.

I still don’t understand.

Because it wasn’t all me, you know, she could have really came through and been Super awesome and not just

I don’t understand but at the same time I don’t want to talk about that anymore. Like ever again really? Yeah, unless some new development happens besides her just pecking on my blog and You know, constantly stalking my shit, even though I have a friend who is a twin flame chaser, And the, oh my gosh, the stuff, she says about the dude and she just straight up, like, deleted her Facebook account, and I know it had something to do with that guy. Her, and I don’t talk as much as we used to, but I don’t know where to start talking about that either but like there was this guy

Oh, she lives in Italy. She’s Georgian like the country. Of Georgia and this guy lived in Italy for like a minute as a waiter, but he’s from Australia and so they crossed paths, you know? And uh

Like, exchanged contact information and started, you know, talking and stuff. And she started messaging me about him because she always messages me when she has like when she’s dealing with some kind of guy when it’s a big deal. And I’m like, you know, I’m kind of like her older cousin or something. Super super beautiful lady though she is, she’s like the most beautiful chick for

Yeah she’s my most beautiful chick friend I guess. Yeah and I mean we’re totally just friends. Yeah it’s like it’s not anything else.

Which is actually kind of funny. But, um,

Uh, she just started messaging me. It was crazy stuff about him, how much she loved him and how much she wanted to marry him and like he was just the most beautiful, you know, magical special, dude, she ever met in her life and She was just freaked out over him and she would send me screenshots of their conversations where she would just be laying into him and being so mean to him. I’m like why are you so mean to him? She said because he does nothing. It’s like what do you want him to do? I want him to marry me, you know, and all this crazy stuff and uh this guy really had no clue and she’s so hot. Like she is so insanely beautiful. And this guy is just the most generic looking, dude, I’ve ever seen And like, it’s like does he have any idea that you feel this way about him? And she told me that she’s like, Uh yeah. She said I told him I like you kind of I’m like, well, that’s all he thinks then, you know, he doesn’t think you. He thinks you’re probably just messing around with him, you know. And so he got with this chick from Colombia. That really took him for a ride. I think she was explaining all this to me. I mean she got a bunch of this Colombian chick like squeezed him for a whole bunch of money. And uh, all kind of crap and I think he ended up going back to her and that’s why my friend Deleted her Facebook. She just got so sick of it, but she stalks him all the time. The last time I talked to her, she was just like You know, telling all about everything that was going on with him. Because she’s still obsessed with him and it was crazy but this guy just thought, you know,

And she was so mean to him and like would just curse him and tell him all kind of crazy stuff and it’s like well, he just

You know, he has you probably for, like on like A, you know, you scare the fucking living hell out of him and then B he has no idea that

You’re his like, he’s your dream guy, you know? And it was kind of funny because that’s a lot like What happened to me except I was the guy and, uh, Yeah. Like I don’t know why else this chick would have went as far as she did messing with me but at the same time it it was really really really mean and it scared me really bad. But I was already messed up, like, if I wasn’t.

So messed up, it wouldn’t have been that big of a deal. That’s that’s what was so crazy about it is uh,

And she never would leave me alone and she would read all my stuff like and she still does sometimes like on my blog and but like,

It was so crazy. And like, I don’t even

You know, because I couldn’t tell it’s like, does this chick, really, like me or is she just obsessed with me? And just You know, is it more fun for her to fuck with my head and drive me crazy? Than like have any kind of real you know, anything with me like what does she want from me? You know and that’s Probably what that guy thought.

Uh, the, you know, the Australian guy about my friend, you know, he’s like gosh why is she You know, like having It’s it’s just it’s it’s ambivalent it’s there. Yeah.

It could be either 1, it’s a little bit of both. Yeah. Or a lot of Both. Hahaha

It’s really, you know, it really sucks though because she’s a really cool chick. And, uh, she’s super intelligent and uh,

She speaks like 5 languages. And um she’s getting her law degree. Of course, she’s been working on it for a while but uh, She’s, I think she’s supposed to be coming to the United States. Oh, sometime like

I thought already really, but uh, he went for this like, you know, plain like Just,

Generic looking Colombian chick. I mean she she wasn’t anything special compared to uh you know my friend who was just this

9:59 PM
Super like beautiful. Intelligent, you know, Lady who to me looks like she’s way out of that guy’s League anyways but that’s who she, you know?

Went nuts about and it’s just crazy. Yeah, I don’t know. But that’s like that helped me. Understand a lot of stuff. It’s kind of, I guess. But it’s like, You know, the energetic exchange was just so intense. Like I couldn’t get seriously within 5 feet of this chick of Brittany without shaking like a fucking crazy person.

And it hurt like it. I didn’t like the effect. It had on me, either. It was just Torture.

I don’t know. It it made me run away and hide. And that’s like, I don’t know, but I’m not a normal person either about this kind of stuff.

But like it’s all that happened, you know, it’s been over 2 years ago, now that all that stuff.

Like happened. Well, it’s approaching the 2-year. Oh it’s just so stupid and I’ll probably will talk about it 1 day. Like what happened? After I left the second car factory. Yeah. After I left Honda

God, I get so tired of talking about this though. I do it’s like, oh yeah, but there’s here some, you know, I don’t think I’ve talked about the whole like my friend, who was the Chaser stuff. I haven’t talked about this. Oh, In this blog yet anyways. But like what? So?

Remarkable to me because I do have a really analytical, you know, scientific for lack of a better term. Oriented. Uh, brain. You know, I don’t just believe in a bunch of stupid crap without evidence but there are shit. Tons of people who have had to deal with this exact same thing. I think I talked about that. Yeah, I have in my other blog uh Mark Sandman From the group morphine the that album the night is that whole thing is about his twin flame crap and it is it’s fucking stupid as shit. Like, You know, objectively, it is so fucking dumb. But when you’re dealing with it?

It’s total insanity. I mean I can’t I don’t know where to start and it got it. Did it got even worse? It got so much worse after I left. Honda

But then like, you know, I haven’t Felt crazy about anything. You know, in relation to that in quite some time. So,

I think probably well, like a couple of months. You have the, um,

The summer shutdown. You know, that, that kind of, that got kind of weird. And then I took some time off after that. I don’t know. It’s just I when I saw her driving through like I had just Quit giving a shit. Until I saw her driving, uh, She drove past my storage unit 1 day and I turned around like I was pulling into my storage unit cuz I was going to get my guitar and stuff and I saw her car going South on 431 and I mentioned that in, in a post that’s you know, fucking 50 posts ago or something.

But like that reignited a bunch of shit. I turned around and followed her and uh Like it, it took. Gosh, all the way from my storage unit in Claysville. Uh, all the way. Halfway into Guntersville, I guess, which was it took about 15 minutes to catch up to her? Yeah. And uh, It was so crazy. Like I started honking the horn on her and it was pouring down rain. And uh, oh gosh, like I could tell it it, you know.

It pissed me off because she wouldn’t look at me like, you know, I don’t know if she thought I was going to be crazy at her or something. I just wanted her to talk to me. Because I mean like what the fuck? Yeah but I guess without telling the whole you know, the whole entire story It’s just kind of, I don’t know. It just seems kind of stupid even more stupid than it really is. But this whole thing ruined my life, I don’t know. That’s why it’s like

Of course my life’s a lot better now, it took a, it took a while, you know, but it finally my life is finally starting feels like it’s starting to get back on track again. And that’s great. I don’t know, I don’t know. I didn’t really Expect to go off on this crap again. You know, again and again it’s like shit. So get out of my fucking brains.

But I have a lot of stuff to do. Like I got my guitar and bass and my speaker and all my crap out of the storage unit because I’m going to track some more songs this week and Probably this weekend. I don’t know, actually how much energy I’m going to.

Have.

I’ll probably edit this and go back to sleep.

But uh, yeah, it was it was just a whole big crazy thing and that’s what helped me. Not feel like I was

Had just completely lost my mind. Either as the, my 1 of my really good friends was dealing with the same thing except the other end of it and then shit, tons of people have dealt with this. I’ve like, read so much stuff about it. It’s a really crazy like Paranormal fucking thing. And it’s so funny to talk to, like, a lot of people about this because they’re like, you know, I might as well tell them, I saw a ghost or something or, like, I got abducted by aliens. Yeah, a lot of people are like okay, dude, whatever It’s like a, you know, I don’t really give a shit if anybody believes it or not, my ex-wife didn’t. You know.

But my ex-wife doesn’t believe in anything.

Oh my goodness. You know, a lot of people don’t believe in anything, not really. If it’s not, you know, detectable by your five senses, it’s it doesn’t exist. That’s that’s how like the bulk of humanity perceives reality.

And The Human Experience is such a narrow like bandwidth I guess for lack of a better. Way to put that, it’s just a, just a tiny little slice, like a really fine line, you know, in eternity. You know, and the infinite or whatever.

But it is like this is just

You know.

Of course a lot of that stuff. Here lately has been hitting me a lot too. It’s like

Shit, you know.

That’s I guess why I’ve been always been drawn into like, you know, art and music because it’s other worlds, it’s more worlds. It’s, you know, more ways to, it’s a different

Like more expansive way to express yourself. To create more worlds

Uh,

Of course then you know as an artist your job is to take all that shit, the imagination and all that and then, you know,

God, process work that, you know, work from that into A, some kind of tangible medium like music or art, or Yeah, this blog. Haha

It’s so funny and it is too. It’s just like, this is what comes out of my brain. As I’m talking

You know. Now I’m starting to get tired. Yeah, I am. I’m really tired but I had a lot of caffeine earlier. I got. Home. Let’s see. I clocked out about 4:30 And I went to Chipotles and oh my God. I got this, uh, I haven’t been to the Chipotle’s in probably a couple months.

And I got this, I got a bowl, I used to get the burritos, but those things are just too. Messy, you might as well just eat them with a fork, too, you know. So it’s like,

Uh,

Yeah, with the chicken and the Rice and black beans, the cheese, and the guacamole, and the sour cream with the corn salsa, That’s pretty much all I’ll put on it and it’s just so much food and then I got home. And I was like, I’m going to do my chores, but I laid down. I guess I got home a little after 5:00. And uh,

I’ll lay down. I was like, I’m just going to, you know, just lay here for a minute and then the next thing I knew it was 8:30. So Yeah. But I don’t feel awful or anything. And I did most of my chores, I did.

3 quarters of them So,

The only reason I didn’t do the the other sweep in the upstairs is because it’s loud and

Uh, I guess it’s a little late for that, it’s probably too late to be blabbering on into my phone, you know? I don’t really know how loud I am outside of this room.

But, uh, yeah, I don’t know. It’s just something clicked in me last week. It’s like, you know, I really did like for my birthday, because my roommate got me a card. That said, make a wish. I was like, you know what, I wish. I had a girlfriend. You know, like it’s it’s been a long time, you know, it’d be fun. And then uh, you know, the first chick that Popped in my head was Helmet girl. And uh,

You know, I don’t know, like, on my Birthday I went out there to the nice Cafeteria. For lunch. And I was like, hey, I like your helmet and she just she immediately went into ignore mode when she saw me. But I mean she you know, she

Pretended to, ignore me, I guess. Yeah. But I mean, she is, she’s just a sweet little lady who wears a helmet. And uh, I don’t know anything about her.

She’s got poofy hair. And it’s kind of blonde colored and she’s just really, really pretty.

And she seems really sweet. I don’t know. But like, who knows? I guess it’s I said I put it like this and my last blog talking about the Twin Flame chick, you know, it’s like if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.

Oh my gosh. Yeah.

Oh my goodness. But um,

Yeah, I’m I’m going to start working on my co-worker song album and I was telling 1 of my co-workers about that earlier and because I made up a song about the mean old lady in Logistics.

Uh, she is, she’s so mean. She’s like the meanest person I’ve met there so far. And uh he’s like gosh she is mean. Haha so I sang the song to him and he thought that was so funny and I was like yeah and then I got a couple of more co-worker songs. There’s this guy I call him Hombrito. And he’s a little jerk is what he is. And that’s why I call him that and I made up a few songs about him.

I was like, yeah I don’t I haven’t made any songs up about you and he’s like, is I don’t know how I feel about that. You know, it’s like, well, do you want me to make up a song about you? Like I could but, you know, you haven’t pissed me off or made me sad or anything. There’s no reason to make a A song. Oh, usually it comes from a conflict. And that’s how I deal with the conflict. So I make up a song about it.

I really need to buy some ibuprofen. Yeah. I was. Going to go to Sam’s Club after work and get stuff but I was so tired. I just thought, you know

Let’s get some food. Who cares? You know, you could spend $15 and get a week’s worth of lunch or breakfast or something. Or you could spend $15 and get this

10:13 PM
Big stupid burrito bowl and I’m still full from it.

Well, kind of

I don’t know, I don’t know what else to say. I guess it’s going to take me probably an hour to edit this. Hahaha haha. Yay.

Thank you, please.