MONDAY MORNINGG

Yesterday 11:44 PM
Well, I am I’m home now. Yeah, I went to The Waffle House and

I got A chicken bacon. Melt

Plate, that was really. Delicious with hash browns. And cheese with chili on it.

There’s a lady there who cooks the best. Texas bacon.

Chicken melts, I’ve ever had.

Ever. Yeah. Haha And sometimes she’s working, she only works like the night shift.

Or like third shift, she works from like I don’t know 9 or 10 till sometime 4 or 5 a.m. yeah, I’ll usually Go in there after work on night shift. Like, once a week and get something and she’s She makes the best food, she’s the best, Waffle House, cook I’ve ever. Like eaten anything from

And I was so happy and I’m so tired. But I’m like

I’m just laying in my bed. I’m so happy just to be laying down and I don’t have to really do anything until tomorrow.

I got to do my chores.

Do that. I’m going to do that, I’ll probably I’ll probably go back to sleep and then when I wake up, I’ll do my chores.

At least most of them.

I have 2 more weeks of Night Shift, And then it’s back on days. I’m halfway through the night shift gauntlet

I don’t know. It’s uh, nights like this though, I wish I had a girlfriend.

Yeah.

I would mash her and pet her with all the love. In the universe haha.

This is my favorite weather and my favorite time of the year.

1:56 AM
Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. I’m just picking up where I left off. I was like. Blah, blah, blah. And then I started thinking about shit and spaced out for a long time, and

Reactivated 1 of my other Facebook accounts I used last year.

And the year before I think I started it like 2 years ago, almost It was after I left the car seat Factory and I started working at the Dollar General and went back to doing house remodeling and it’s really funny how happy I look. When I’m doing house remodeling, which was my favorite job ever?

It sure was.

That’s kind of like the dream I had. I was like I did all this crazy stuff. With house remodeling. And Was showing the guy pictures of the Pavilion.

I built with my, uh, boss for this pharmacist. Who is a friend of, uh,

My friend Eric’s cousin, no Aunt. It’s her aunt. It’s his aunt. Yeah. What the My brain Jesus. And, uh, yeah, they are pharmacist friends, they work in this, uh, Pharmacy. I can’t remember what it was called in Fort Payne. Yea, Alabama,

I was going to try and go back to sleep, but I just reactivated that account and

Um, blocked. Brittany Haha. Yeah, it was the craziest thing too Saturday morning, I got up and got around and there was a hawk on my car when I left. I was like, what the fuck?

It was uh, it was pretty cool though actually But I went to my storage unit to clean out my car cuz they have a big dumpster there. And that’s where I usually when I’m going to get the kids and my car is all Piled up with the trash. From like the last time. I get the kids. I clean out my car. Yeah. Every time I go get the kids and I go by, I go right, past my storage unit. So, I’ll stop in there, and I like, look around at my stuff. And then I go, um, Clean out the front seat, all the trash in the floorboard.

And when I was pulling out of the fucking like I turned around, in the parking lot by the dumpster and I was about to pull onto the 4-way and Brittany Drives right By. Like, It just makes me wonder. It’s like, what is she doing in Huntsville? Like I know she’s not just up there. Stalking me. She has to have like a job or something. Because last I looked she was doing the massage therapy, or she had gotten her license or some shit. And I was like, well,

There’s no telling. But I wasn’t about to follow her down, I was like, you know, last time I did she wouldn’t even look at me, she’ll peck on my blog and you know stalk my shit constantly online but when I catch up to her in person. In Guntersville Um, you know, and honked the horn at her and like she I don’t know if she thought I was going to be crazy or something. Which, I mean that’s what she would deserve.

But I wasn’t. I wanted to talk to her. I don’t understand what.

You know, it’s really just fucking stupid. Yeah, I mean that’s kind of the thing I was just uh, Because she was pecking on my blog like all last week and the week before. And um, It’s just, you know, like it is a really small world. And, you know, nothing.

Everything happens for a reason and the lattice of coincidence and all that crap. But like You know. That’s the second time. I’ve seen her drive by my storage unit

And of course, the last time she was coming from Huntsville into Guntersville and this time she was coming from I guess wherever she lives in Weaver, Alabama.

Up to Huntsville, but who knows? I figure it has something to do with. She’s probably doing some kind of crap up here. Yeah but You know, I don’t care that much anymore. And, It is, it’s just probably about the dumbest thing I’ve ever had to deal with from a woman.

Yeah.

It’s like, you know, you can stalk the crap out of me, but

You know, like what is, what the hell is wrong with her?

But I did, I just reactivated that account. I’m going to leave it up for posterity like I did my other alternate account I made after My ex fiance and I split up, but I made that account to hide from her because she was stalking my main account. Gosh, what some crazy shit.

But stuff like that though that’s you know, I was thinking, oh, I wish I had a girlfriend and all that crap, but Which I’ve gotten a lot better, I have and I just don’t think I’ve met number 7 yet. I just don’t think so. But um,

I feel like that’s why I’ve been single for so long. Yeah, I mean stuff like that. Crazy ass.

Fucking stuff.

And I did, I went through a phase there where I was like, I’m not too good for any woman and oh my God. Made me realize that actually, I was Yeah. Gosh. Oh my goodness.

The void was so great, you know, that was left by the divorce. But, I mean enough about all that crap. It’s just

Sometimes I do get lonely, it’s stupid. But That’s why I’m a musician and an artist and all that crap Feeds my creativity. More than anything though. I just miss my kids. You know, I wish I had another day with my kids, like, You know, I was thinking that before we checked out this morning, I was like, or yesterday morning and I was like, dang, I wish we had 1 more day. You know, but I get my bonus in about 3 weeks. We’ll do something fun then.

But yeah it was funny to poke through that old account which I mean it’s not that old. I deactivated it last year and went back to my main 1.

But it’s got all the pictures and stuff. I worked at the chicken plant for about 4 months and I added a few people there. 1 of them was this chick, I had a huge crush on, and I just

It was 1 of those things though. It’s like we don’t have anything in common, she was just super cute and really sweet. And uh, you know, it was just 1 of those things that probably would have lasted a couple of months and Like I’m not doing that again. That’s what happened right after I got divorced. You know, I had, uh,

3, girlfriends and a fiance in a year and a half. And then it was like, dude, what are you fucking doing? I mean, you know, a lot of people might can do that kind of shit, but not me, you know.

My last girlfriend was like that, which I think maybe she’s finally found somebody who’s going to put up with her. But also treat her like a person, you know, actually be decent to her.

I don’t know. That’s It’s funny though. Um, But a lot. Lot of chicks think I’m too good to be true. That’s what a lot of chicks think about me and my daughter said, it’s because I’m too perfect. You know, I know that might sound like You know, it is, it does sound pretty retarded but I make

A serious, like, not just effort, but I really care about If I’m in a relationship with somebody, you know, I’m super

Accommodating and loving and I don’t. Talk to other people, you know, I’m exclusive.

And, It’s just

Retarded. Then I just start to think about how retarded and stupid and I just use those words, a bunch to describe relationships and love, and all that. But that’s all it’s ever been for me.

I figured I was, you know, like when I get out and start playing my music again, I’ll meet somebody, but holy shit. It’s almost November now and I haven’t done. Hardly anything this year.

Of course, you know working at a car factory. I’m tired a lot and I didn’t, I still haven’t gotten enough rest this weekend. Which that’s probably, I’m fixing to edit.

After I make this post, I’ll probably be tired enough to go to sleep. But I want to do stuff because the weather’s. Awesome. And um, 1 of The Tuning Keys, uh, on my banjo, the screw fell out. So it’s all wobbly and It doesn’t stay in tune very well and I’ve got to fix that. It’s not that hard to fix. I can probably rob

A screw off 1 of these.

Tuning keys, on the, um, my daughter’s guitar that my son jumped on and broke that I’ve been meaning to fix for the last

Probably 6 months. Yeah.

It just needs some wood glue. He broke it. Um, back in like 2017 and I fixed it and then he tripped over it. Probably back in like January or something and broke it again.

January, or February or March, I guess it was March now that I think about it because I didn’t have a car at the time I was like crap I can’t come get it. You know, he called me up crying that he broke it and he felt really bad. It’s like, dude, it’s okay.

I hate to say this but uh 1 of my friends gave me this guitar. I think he stole it, you know, this was a long time ago.

It’s it’s really funny to think about the friends, I grew up with. They were all really a bunch of troublemakers. Yeah, I have a lot of dead friends too.

I really do, like it’s sad.

But the guy who gave me this guitar, he was my first friend in school. His name is Scooter.

And he in, I think kindergarten he walked up to me, he goes, hey, what’s your name? And I told him my name, you know, and my name is clay and he’s like Uh,

Jesus Christ.

Anyways, um,

And now it’s just another transaction update and this was the $8 tip from last week when I got Vietnamese food. So I guess I have even less money.

Um,

Which I’m supposed to get the deposit back from the hotel room, probably the next day or 2. That’s 100 bucks. So that’ll get me through the rest of the week. Anyways. What was I saying? Oh yeah. Um,

An optimist. I mean, it’s like scooter and I was like, I have a Fish named scooter and we laughed and then we were friends. But he, uh, He was a totally different, like,

Oh, man. He He came from a totally different, like,

Uh place than I did like he didn’t have a really stable home life, I guess, is a nice way to put that. And uh his parents wouldn’t let him like ever come over or do anything.

Like I would have a birthday party and then I would always invite him, but he never could come his mom would never let him come. And so, uh, you know, eventually I got to be better friends with the other kids who could come to my birthday parties and it sucked. You know, because he was really like, he’s still like he he still is 1 of my best friends.

2:10 AM
But uh, I just, I don’t know, we grew apart, but we reconnected in 2014 and then I found out. He was, uh, you know, he was into like

Crime. Haha

It was kind of funny. Um,

But uh, I mean we’re just like old friends again, you know, but he’s like, here’s this guitar.

I gave him a deep freeze. Yeah.

We weren’t using it. I was like, here. You can have this? Damn deep freeze, dude.

And so, uh, but yeah.

He gave me

Quite a few things actually that were probably stolen.

But anyways, yeah.

I thought about just buying her a whole new guitar, but I’m going to try to fix it. I just don’t ever think about it. I’m just like, just now looking at the tuning Keys, thinking about getting 1 of these screws off of it. It’s the first time I’ve thought about that guitar in about a month or so.

And I do, I need to get some wood glue.

My daughter actually can play guitar a little bit, you know, it’s funny.

Yeah, shit. I am so tired but I want to do stuff. That’s what I did last weekend. I was really really tired but

Um, I wanted to do stuff. So I drank a whole bunch of coffee And ended up not getting any rest and being even more tired.

I have to do my chores, you know.

Shit.

But yeah, it was it’s really funny. The happiest I’ve ever been working is when I was doing house remodeling because I can take pictures of crap and videos of stuff and everything I do just like every day pretty much was something like there was always something funny or crazy that I could take a picture of

Or something. Cool. I was doing that. I could take a video of

Like look what I made, you know, I made a box with a lid on it. You know, with hinges or, you know, spray painted this cabinet or

You know, painting a Wall green

You know, 1 time. I think it rained. Yeah. And uh,

Like it was it was overcast but it wasn’t supposed to rain. And I was painting this window frame. Yeah. And it rained it washed all my paint off of it. And I was sad.

You know, I spent like an hour doing it too. It was the second coat.

Anyways, but I did. I had a lot of fun. That’s the last time. Uh, my last stint of doing house, remodeling last year was probably the most fun overall. Even though the time before that was uh,

When I went to South Alabama on all those work trips, those were fun too. That was That was a really interesting crazy period of my life.

I didn’t have a car then either.

It was really funny.

But also, I guess last year, too, it was, I took a lot of pictures of the apartment and around downtown Albertville

And posted them on that account, and looking around at all, that stuff, it just it reminded me of all that and made me miss my mom.

Yeah. Sometimes I really, really miss my mom.

I don’t. I’ll never feel like she deserved. You know, like, How you know, to?

End up like that.

She deserved to live another 10 or 15 years and be happy. I figured, you know, my sister could help her a lot more than I could and she tried it was really

Messed up.

So sad.

It’s really sad.

Oh crap. What else can I say?

I still have some coke left from The Waffle House. Yeah, Coca-Cola. The drink ha. I gotta Coke to go. Um, I’ve still got some of it left.

I hate to say that I’m getting hungry again. I ate 3, woelfels this morning or yesterday morning. Yeah, 3 woelfel. What the fuck? Waffles, 3, waffles.

Yeah.

Anyways.

I do love Hotel.

Waffle breakfasts. Haha

And the waffle house but I hardly ever get waffles from The Waffle House. I usually get a chicken bacon melt plate with hash browns and cheese and chili on my hash browns.

What else can I say? I think this is actually a pretty long post because I forgot I made a like half a post before I started talking again. Well, you know I guess uh that’s what it was though about. Like

Not feeling like I’m too good for any woman, you know, and how like I’m accommodating and too good to be true kind of shit, right? Well, what the kind of part of why the way I felt about that was like, you know, I put a 1000%. Especially the last like,

Oh gosh, after we had kids and stuff, uh, you know, into my marriage. Like I mean every Part, like my entire soul. Into that shit and it wasn’t good enough, you know? I mean, that’s that’s kind of where all that came from. I was going to type all this up, but I was like, no, I’m just going to talk it out. So but uh, yeah, that’s where

That’s where my reasoning for that. I guess came from. You know, it’s stupid.

Now, I feel kind of weird talking about it.

But anyways, I feel better though about myself than I did. You know, 4 years ago or even a year ago? Yeah, a whole lot better and hopefully, I’ll find somebody soon.

You know, it’s It’s not that big of a deal if I don’t but it’s like shit.

Just going to waste y’all, haha hahaha. Thank you, please.