WEDNESDAY MORNING

5:36 AM
Oh my gosh. Yeah, I feel Like crap. But guess what? I’m at work, I’m at the parking lot of work.

I’m in it. Yeah. It’s really foggy. And for some reason, though, I just overslept for like an hour and which is fine because I usually get to work. Super early. Anyways.

Except this morning. I didn’t get a shower or anything I just said, fuck.

And came to work.

And there’s always some idiot with their headlights on in the parking lot. When it’s dark, it’s like I don’t know. It’s like a thing too. People talk about in the group in the Facebook group for work,

Which I also speaking of Facebook stuff, I accidentally sent the chick.

Uh, who drives me nuts? Who works up the fucking line. Yeah, I accidentally sent her a friend request yesterday. She pops up on the people I may know all the time. That was like, whoops. Yeah. I don’t know if I’ll ever talk to her, but

I don’t know if I’ll ever love again. I really don’t.

Sometimes I feel like I’m too far gone. I’ve been single for too long and I’ve been hurt too much and I’ve had the most ridiculous entanglements ever. Like Brittany and my ex fiance, you know? And then I have to remind myself. It’s like those were some really specific extreme cases. You know, most chicks aren’t like that. Most women are not fucking psychotic insane. Like that, you know?

But some of them are and like I have, I’ve had I have loved the most evil women on this planet. I don’t ever talk about my ex-girlfriend Hannah, the 1 before Stephanie. Yeah. Which I have talked about Stephanie, I haven’t talked about Stephanie in a long time and I’m not going to start.

Right now but uh, Stephanie was also pretty bad.

But she also got a whole entire album worth of songs that uh, I’ll never play. Yeah, I think there’s like 1 song that I might do or something, but I doubt it. Like most of those like 14, some odd songs. Yeah. I’ll never play them again. I’ve forgotten like Like how to play and the words and shit to a lot of them you know that was almost 5 years ago.

But I’ve been single for 5 years, like in March and it’s been since her

It’s so crazy, you know? And then there was that Tiffany chick, oh my God and it’s I guess it’s no big secret. Now, where I work, but like uh, she used to work here. And when I first got hired and I worked here before, this is the first car factory. Yeah, I got to come back here and, uh,

When I first hired in I thought I would just see her, I would be like, you know, I’m just going to run into her. It’s going to be weird but kind of funny, you know.

But uh, guess what? She had been out on workman’s comp. I don’t know if she’s on disability now or something, but she doesn’t work here anymore. She got married but her husband works here and I was in the, uh, maintenance.

Orientation, I guess Monday, uh, just to inquire mostly inquiring about the maintenance. Hello. Yeah, the maintenance.

Program. I don’t know that I’m going to be able to I’m still going to apply and everything but that’s a long shot right now maybe next year but holy shit.

Um lo and behold though here he walks in he’s the last person to walk into the fucking thing though and I’m I look up and I was like dang there he is. I saw him uh, about a month ago. Uh, he works in the logistics Department. On the other side of the plant. I guess that’s where they met. Yeah, because that’s what she did too, and

Uh, it’s just really remarkable to me. But Tiffany broke my fucking heart so bad and she lied to me. She led me on, like I never had a woman do exactly what Tiffany did to me. Uh, before it was really weird, she just straight up lied to me about having a boyfriend, you know, and led me on real bad, my kids met her kids. And all this shit and then all of a sudden you know she just starts ghosting me and it was fucked up.

And, uh, then you know, she tries to message me again like a month later and stuff. And I’m just like, well, uh, okay, you know, I thought maybe at first, though, she needed some space cuz I thought it was moving, maybe a little too fast.

My daughter told me, she was like, you know, uh,

She’s probably got a secret boyfriend and she did, she didn’t have anything on her Facebook. That would indicate a relationship or anything when we first got together. It was really fucked up. But it was a different guy than she married. Haha So, uh, yeah. And I cried over her for about 2 months straight which set the stage for what happened with Brittany. Because after that, I didn’t trust anything. And I thought, well Brittany’s, just going to fucking, you know,

Break my fucking heart too. She’s just going to like she’s going. Oh she did so much worse. I wasn’t healed and she read about all this stuff in my other blog. That’s what’s so weird about it and she decided she would be a complete sack of shit. Instead of being like, hey, maybe this guy needs like somebody to be nice to him. That’s all I needed. That’s all it would have taken. But instead I got a fucking stalker and she only got away with it because I liked her so much that’s what was so weird and that. Yeah, Brittany. So uh anyways, completely ruined my life.

And,

Just fucked up so much stuff. It was uh,

Super extra retarded and she hasn’t pecked on any of my blogs that I could tell. Anyways, Um,

In about a 3 weeks. Yeah. So, I don’t know. It’s just

That’s why stuff like that, though is why I don’t really trust Uh, co-worker chicks for 1 thing and uh, Not that there’s anything wrong with all of them, you know, it’s just I’ve had some extreme cases and I’m traumatized basically is what it is. I have A lot of trauma, but it’s stupid trauma, but it’s like, it’s enough, you know.

Where I really, really get apprehensive about talking to any lady from work because, uh, Well, first and foremost, we probably don’t have a lot in common just your average person from work anyways because I’m like I’m a crazy artist and Uh, I don’t really fit in anywhere, I don’t even, like, even like amongst people that you would think I would fit in with, I don’t fit in

Um, it’s Really funny. Yeah. But uh,

I don’t know, I don’t really know what else to say about all that. It’s just

Accidentally sent that chick and a friend request. I cancelled it though. Haha I don’t know.

It probably. Would probably wouldn’t be, she doesn’t seem like a horrible person either, you know, Tiffany was like,

You know, she had been pretty horrible about, you know, she had a lot of substance abuse problems and stuff. But she was sober for about a year. Like I don’t know how to frame that but I don’t want to talk about her ever again either. I just thought it was really crazy that her husband you know like and if if her and I would gotten married like you know it probably wouldn’t have lasted 5 or 6 years anyways like who knows? Yeah, I figured she probably just wanted some guy to take care of her and you know, everything kind of fell in.

Place for her regarding that. Yeah.

That’s kind of, you know,

A woman with a 19 Soul number. Yeah. Um, which I’ve, I haven’t talked about that. Uh, I said, I’m surrounded constantly like my whole life by women with 19, soul numbers. My mom.

My last stepmom.

Uh, I don’t know about the current stepmom. My ex fiance and the chick after her who lives up here. I’ve talked about a little bit last week and the week before.

Um and Tiffany and uh this chick, this polish chick who was a love interest at 1 time. And the roommate I give money to. Yeah, the boss lady roommate.

And this lady that I almost got mixed up with last year from the chicken plant.

Had a 19 Soul number, which scared the living hell out of me because nothing has ever like any kind of

Beyond superficial, you know, interactions with, uh, women with 19 soul numbers have

Caused problems for me. I don’t really know how else to put that, but, you know, in varying degrees sometimes it’s not, you know, it isn’t always

Way the fuck overboard awful as What happened with my ex fiance, you know, and Tiffany and

Stuff. What’s so funny is it probably wasn’t even that big of a deal to Tiffany. It was like you know just another Tuesday. I was just some stupid guy she lied to to get what she wanted from and then you know, I served my purpose. I don’t know.

Whatever though, right? But shit like that. Is why I have been single for so long but then another reason is time has just flown the fuck by. It’s like all of a sudden it’s wow, it’s 2026. Oh yeah, I’ve been single for almost 5 years. Yeah, well, you know, I’m not really in a hurry to fix that either.

I guess I need to get my shit together and go into the plant. Yay. I don’t know if I’ll even post this, but I might ha ha. Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha. Thank you. Please.