THURSDAY OMG

4:14 AM

Hey there. Yeah.

Oh my gosh, I’m just hanging out in my car. Oh, waiting for it to warm up.

So I guess I only have 2 roommates, now, that’s funny.

Isn’t it?

Yeah, something must have happened. I think um,

With uh, the people that the couple and the boss lady roommate. And I don’t know, I can’t remember. It seems like though they were friends on Facebook and now they’re not. So it must have been pretty bad but uh, I don’t know, they just seem like They were just.

Young and ungrateful is what uh, The biggest impression I had from them and they’re both giant potheads and like, I think the dude works at Buffalo Wild Wings. And she doesn’t do anything. Except stay up all night long playing video games. I mean, they were just You know, just a couple of

Babies, I guess. I don’t know. I don’t hate them or anything, but I still don’t like them for Smarting me up about those dogs.

Uh that I shouldn’t even have had to say anything about after. I gave them my room that I didn’t have to do and I don’t know if I want that room back or not, honestly, haha.

I mean, I could I could be like, hey, You know, but I don’t care. I was looking at my chores though cuz uh earlier I went downstairs and the chore board

Uh, with the little bubbles on it. Um, it was a bunch. Yeah and it was just sweeping and mopping, the floors and yard work. It’s not a big deal. I don’t know how long. Uh I’m just going to have 2 roommates. There was supposed to be another person moving in but they were all friends with the people who just moved out and the other guy who moved out earlier. In the month Um,

So I don’t, I don’t think they are. Yeah, I don’t think they’re moving in. After all, like something must have went down. I don’t know. Like part of me just kind of wonders, out of curiosity. But then part of me, just just, like, I don’t care. I don’t care that much. Just it was probably something ridiculous. You know.

Anyways, at least, uh, I hope whoever moves in next though is not worse. Haha Yeah, than the people who just moved out I mean they weren’t the worst people I’ve ever met. That’s that’s kind of the thing I got to give them that, you know, they weren’t certainly not the worst. Yeah, even the dude that moved out like Total fucking asshole douchebag. He’s still not the worst guy I ever met.

Uh, in a weird. Synchronistic like turn of events or, uh, I guess happen, stance. I don’t know An Occurrence. Um, Back in the day, I don’t use my pen name anymore. Um, It’s uh on my other blog though it’s Memphis mem p. H e t. Yeah, and uh, this is long story behind that name. It was my first name of like the first Incarnation I had on this planet, right? Haha I know that sounds.

Probably, I don’t know how that sounds to anybody else. But um,

Used to, when you would Google that this uh, shit would pop up this mephit, fur meet.

I’m going to have to type all that in. Yeah. And, uh, Like I would Google my name, Memphet you know, my pen name and, that would pop up. Did you mean Memphis? Haha I’ll I’ll fiddle with that later and get some search results and screenshot them, but, uh, like that was just the thing. I was like, what the hell is this fur? Meet, you know, and, oh, it’s furries. That was, like, the first time I found out about furries and this was like, 25 years ago? Or longer. Yeah, and I would Google my name because I was involved really heavily in bands. Uh like, you know? Like bands and music scenes in a few different areas. And I just wanted to see if anybody you know, was talking about me or talking shit and uh, a lot of stuff. Yeah, a lot of times I would find more people would be just ripping me to pieces on a guest book, haha. You know, and it’s like, oh yeah, well, you motherfuckers

It was really funny. It was a totally different. Like I was a totally different person in my late, teens, and early 20s, before my ex-wife and I moved in together. I was a like you wouldn’t even think It was the same person. Um, if you had met me in 1999. Haha I’m a better person now but

I miss my old like the How much I loved myself and cared about myself back then I did that was you know I, um,

Hating myself was like that wasn’t ever a thought. I never I was never depressed before in my life. Like until I moved in with my ex-wife that was like, I didn’t know what Depression was like, for real. Oh my gosh. So crazy. But uh, anyways That would pop up. Every time I would Google my name for A lot like I think the even the last time I did which wasn’t, you know, that long ago Um, But what was so funny is the people that moved out were all furries, they’re furries and uh,

They had a MIP fit for meat card. Um,

Like it was in the, uh, dust pan. I guess, they had swept it up when they swept the room out, or something. And I was just like, wow, like that fucking thing. From when I used to Google my name, my pen name like, oh my God. So that was kind of a funny thing coming full circle, you know.

Oh, it’s time to go.

It’s Thursday. I got paid last night or yesterday afternoon.

Oh, sorry. Broomy

Oh another story, my other roommate, the 1 who took me back and forth to work her car is uh apparently dead and she’s got to get it hauled off to the scrapyard today and, uh, I don’t know. You know, she scared the living absolute living, hell out of me, and drove me crazy. And was a lot more drama and stuff that I was ever prepared to deal with, uh, you know, just taking me back and forth to work. Haha Like this lady. Oh my God. She stressed me out all the time but she helped me. I paid her though very well. I did. I paid her. So much money to take me back and forth to work.

And she was instrumental in helping me, uh, you know, securing that job. And then she got me this car hooked me up with uh, the lady. I bought this car from which this is my favorite car ever. I love this car. I don’t ever want another car. And um,

Uh, I’m just thinking I got to get the air conditioner fixed before the summer. But uh,

It just makes me sad. Yeah, she helped me out a whole bunch and I love the crap out of her. You know.

It’s just

I guess I ought to holler at her and ask her, what happened? Yeah, she’s uh, she’s a good person.

I don’t know, I feel like It’s kind of a weird feeling cuz now, you know, the house feels kinda empty. It was just, you know, teeming with stuff for, you know, a long time. And then now it’s just me and 2 other roommates and it’s like well dang.

Oh, it feels though, it feels better, but I thought that was funny. I saw that card. I was like no fucking way, but they, they were, you know, they are furries. The 3 of them and I think, I don’t know, I just think that’s funny.

Gosh, I went to a Mexican restaurant last night, and for the first time in like, 3 months, I got a tiny little Margarita. Oh, it was so good too. It was delicious. It was.

And then of course I got a canned Uh, Cayman Jacks Margarita like on the way home. And I didn’t open it until I got home. Yeah. But um,

I’ve got a little bit of a hangover today and it was fun. You know, like being old tipsy last night I was like, Yay. I was just like You know, I was starting to make a blog post but I fell asleep.

But I did. I was poking around online and I did send this chick from work, uh, a friend request twice and and cancelled it. And thought, what the hell am I doing? You know, oh my gosh, she drives me so crazy. And I’ve talked about her before, she’s the 1 who used to work on my line and then they moved her and all these ladies, uh, pop up on the people. I may know on Facebook, like all the time and there’s another 1. I think it was a few weeks ago. I, I accidentally sent her for an request and I was like, shit, you know, because I was just scrolling through and my thumb hit the send a friend requests, you know button.

Uh, but You know, really As much as like, I mean it’s just a revolving door of about a dozen chicks from where I work on the people. I may know all the time. And I know they look at my stuff. Because of the way they look at me when I see them out in the plant. Uh, but you know, The best I can tell none of them are reading my blog and, you know, I do like

Sometimes I really wish I had a girlfriend, but Like, I don’t know right now. Like I got paid. The first thing I wanted to do was go get the kids. It’s just

God, they live 2 hours away and I figured you know it would be like by the time I got home last night and everything it would have been like 10 or 11 o’clock and I was tired but I’m going to get them Saturday and I was just thinking, you know, I just blabber about all this crazy stuff and anybody can read it. That’s 1 of the things that’s kind of caused me. Uh, some problems with my blog in the past.

But it’s like, it’s stupid, because You know, people go nuts with it. Oh gosh people act a lot of people who find my blog act, like they found some kind of like hidden stash of Secrets and it’s, you know, like it’s not it’s just me. Blabbering into my phone, you know speech to text like my supervisor who found it back in 2020 like oh my God like she just tried to act like I was because I talked about her in my blog

She just tried to act like you know, it was some big fucking thing but it wasn’t. She was like you just make these huge crazy looking posts? It’s like, well it’s all speech to text. Do you know that’s half the fun? Yeah and uh this chick who threw herself at me all year long too and I wasn’t ready to talk to anybody I was still getting over the worst fucking girlfriend, I like, oh my God, like the worst person I could have ever dated, uh, I was still like, reeling from that. I was traumatized from this chick. Oh, it was so dumb though. And, you know, that’s the thing. Like I’m just a big stupid piece of meat.

You know, to a lot of chicks. And I hate that.

4:28 AM
But, You know, that’s nothing compared to what, you know, most women have to deal with. But, holy shit.

But, you know, uh, my supervisor, she was also a tweaker and she would get all this crazy shit up in her head and she had a Cleopatra complex. And she was this fucking, beautiful lady but she was so mean and dumb, she was the supervisor and, uh, all that just went to her fucking head, like real bad.

And it was really, really stupid but she got married and it looks like to a pretty decent guy. Yeah, but God knows what that man’s had to put up with.

Like, I have no idea, you know, she’s not on Facebook anymore, but She was a really just a rotten little turd of a lady. Haha

Anyways though, um, shit. Yeah.

But I was just thinking, like,

Um, I mean, maybe she’s better now, right? But it’s like, you know, any of these ladies from work. Couldbjust read my fucking stuff and be like, what the hell, this guy, you know, and they do, that’s what happened with Brittany.

She uh read about this. You know, there was this chick I liked from work and figured out. It was her And it fucking, you know, she Just I don’t know what she got it all into her head after that, it wasn’t any more complicated than that. Except that I kept running away. But uh, she also read about why

I don’t know. I’m going off in the deep and I’m going to probably edit a lot of that out. So

But holy shit, I don’t know, it’s just like, oh, you know, I have 5 roommates and then all of a sudden it’s like, I don’t know.

Like nope, just got 2 now. I think 1 of the uh, The, the most I guess as far as wisdom goes, probably the 1 of the

Things my dad said that actually made sense 1 time but he was talking about life. He’s like, you know, if you don’t like your life just wait and things will change. And they do. Yeah, they do so much.

I don’t know. I’m trying to like not talk about the distant past and stuff so much because I did in the last Probably week or so worth of posts like way more than usual.

But hell sometimes it’s fun to look back. I mean sometimes it isn’t sometimes it hurts so much but you know, shit that’s the life you live. The And uh, it’s like it’s just wow, all this stuff and it just happens. And you can act.

You know, or not depending on what you choose. And you know, you choose things that’s based already on like You know things that have already happened. You’re already predisposed to like certain things. Anyways. Like cause and effect and I was trying to explain this 1 time to 1 of my friend, Justin’s friends This guy named Heath who ended up hating me because I’m like, you know, you don’t really have free will it’s an illusion and here’s why and I proved it to him and he just wouldn’t accept it because that would mean he didn’t have control of anything. And if I was not that like you have freedom of mind, you have awareness, But you know, why do you you know what’s your favorite color? Like blue? Like wow. You know, why is your favorite color blue? Why do you like tacos better than burritos? You know, do you think about?

Like why all this stuff? Why are you 6’5 and Justins? You know, 5 foot 10 and he’s like, you know, because of genetics and it’s like yeah but what is genetics? You know, it’s code it’s just information and you know all this stuff and none of it is you can’t separate. It’s all the same thing, the world and um you know what happens and what you do is based on things forces going back to the beginnings of. Time. And, And um, I guess this

Is the, you know, what unfolding or processes that stretch back and forth And around and around, you know, it’s gosh, it’s so vast and

Remarkable. And Mind-blowing really to think about it. I mean, it is at first and then it’s like, well, that’s just normal, you know? But this dude hated my guts for telling him all this stuff and explaining it to him in a way that was really easy to understand.

God, he hated me. Yeah. Oh man.

It was really weird. Like I’ve never met somebody with such an overblown ego like that before. Oh he was a plant biologist. I think actually something like that. Yeah, that’s another story, that’s a long story. There was, uh, I don’t know, I’ll have to tell the story of of the of of Team pine cone 1 day. Yeah. Like gosh, man.

All the other guys there, though, in the group, loved me, like, I’m friends with them on Facebook and they like, comment and react to my shit all the time. And that guy fucking kicked me out of the group text chat. You know, it’s like, wow.

I had forgotten all about that. Yep. All about that until like Just now. Um gosh that what was my point in any of that? Yeah, life. I don’t know.

But yeah, people will like stalk my social media like my pictures, and my videos, and all that stuff, but very few people will go as far as to read my blog, you know, they might look at it and be like, what the hell is this, and then that’s it, you know? But some people Every now and then I’ll get somebody stalking my blog because it’s funny, it is, it’s just like, it’s here’s all the crap in my head. It’s pretty much unfiltered and I do I have talked about a lot of crazy shit and what I really think about people and things you know, but it’s nothing, I would not say to anybody’s face.

I don’t have uh, there’s no like this version of me or that version of me, you know? Like I’m me I’m the same version of me like across the map. Uh um I’m very polite and accommodating and nice and it’s genuine.

You know.

A lot of shit that people do doesn’t make sense to me. And that’s where a lot of the conflict comes from.

Yeah.

I don’t know, I was just thinking about my supervisor, you know, it’s like dang that was uh, Shit. Almost

5 and a half years ago.

Yeah, I don’t know. I was just thinking what a, you know, and I mean here’s this crackhead fucking chick who is actually my boss thinking she’s doing some real investigative work or something. By reading my blog and The resulting Drama. Haha That’s like 1 of my ex-girlfriends. The 1 that I was recovering from when that supervisor was throwing herself at me. Which is why I ran away from her too. I wasn’t ready to love again. That happens to me, right? Oh gosh but Um, she did the same thing to me. The ex girlfriend. She googled my stuff and found my blog and just thought she had, you know, Finally Found, You Know, found out the truth and it’s like well you know, most of the stuff that I talk about is stuff I had already told her You know, and that’s a long crazy story too, but it’s not worth telling because it’s stupid.

You know.

I don’t know. Geez. It’s funny that like when somebody passes you in their car. You can smell weed on the interstate, like somebody is.

Smoking weed, so hard. That you can smell it coming out of their vehicle. Hahaha

Well, at least I’m going to get to work. When I normally get to work. Yeah. Today I woke up at like 2:30.

Yeah, no crazy numbers this morning. I was just like, hey the crazy thing that happened was finding that card. Yeah, uh but I might actually go to the gym. I might do that. Yeah.

Oh, it’s rotation weekend. So that means I get an extra like I can sleep in Monday. And usually when that happens I work out really hard on Friday nights and I work out all that stuff is better on night shift.

Than it is on days. And I don’t know, I was just thinking about how freaked out. I get about the gym, girl. You know, it’s just Oh, I’m so ridiculous about this stuff. I was thinking about that yesterday. It’s like, man.

There’s not a lot of people. Who are that traumatized and afraid of love. The way I am. But it’s, you know, it is kind of funny. It, it sucks, though.

Part of me wants to take a nap. Yeah.

I don’t know, I don’t really know what else to say. I’m like, getting up close to the exit now.

Oh, I just love having money having money, getting paid, and having money again. It was a struggle. It was

But I have to get a water bottle. I have to remember to get a big water bottle.

Well, what else can I say? I don’t know. I’m like,

I’ve said a lot of stuff.

The last couple of posts I’ve made have been way over 5,000 words.

I don’t know.

Oh,

I still got this crud too.

It’s like it’s gotten better, but I’m still coughing.

Yeah, and all that crap. It’s like God get out of me sickness.

Oh, yuck.

Wish I have brought my guitar. I could have played it. I could have like sat out in the parking lot for a little bit practice my Flamingo strumming.

Yeah.

That’s something. I’m I’m really I’m really going to have to like,

Fit in practicing? Yeah. Like I haven’t been doing that and a lot of it is. It’s the winter time and it’s cold and that little space heater. I have It works great when it’s like in the 30s or 40s, you know. But, But when it’s in the teens or the 20s, it’s it’s not that Effective, but it’s still better than nothing.

I don’t know.

I don’t know what I’m going to do, uh because and that’s another thing too. My roommate. Uh,

1 of her friends was over last night and I didn’t know what all they were going to be doing and I didn’t want to be out in the garage yelling, a bunch of crazy shit.

I don’t know.

But I don’t know, going to be so hard on myself about it either. Well, here I am at the RaceTrac gas station.

448 443? Yeah.

Somebody going.

Cotton.

Duck cotton.

Duck hunting with. I don’t know what you would think that I was saying, haha, God, I’m tired. Oh my God. And I am slightly hung over and You know, Jesus.

Thank you, please.