FRIDAY

4:30 AM
Well gosh.

You know, I am in. Uh, I’m still at home. I’m waiting for my car to warm up a little bit.

I got home yesterday about 6:00. I went to Tennessee and got lottery tickets.

And fucking um passed out. I ate I got some barbecue and I ate that and then I passed out until about 2

I woke up. Well, it was about yeah. I was like 2 after 2.

A little after 2.

I was trying to make a post in my room but I can’t like I talk too loud and

Sometimes I Trail off into subject matter, that is really none of my roommates’ business. If any of them overhear me and Yeah, the new roommate. I don’t know. Yeah, I don’t really know what. To quite what to make of her.

Um,

I mean, you know, besides that, she’s cute but, you know, that doesn’t Matter, like not really. Haha. Yeah, I just, I don’t know. I don’t think she’s evil or anything, I just don’t, I don’t know. I’m just like laying there and blabbering about shit and it’s like, oh yeah. Um, Brittany pecking on my blog again.

Well, it’s Friday the 13th, right? Yeah, it is. And uh, last month was a Friday, the 13th and that’s when my daughter saw Brittany’s car in a wreck. So like, who knows what today?

I, I don’t know.

Ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha ha. I’m just like my brains. I had a dream about my friend. Troy though. Yeah. You know, he was, uh, he was 1 of the best friends I ever had. He was. I talked about him before he was larger than life. Literally gosh, he was so fucking Just the best, dude, he was. And Oh,

I don’t know. I got married and You know, the life I had with my ex-wife, you know, some of my friends. Didn’t really, you know, uh,

I don’t know how to say it but I didn’t really get like the, I lost touch. I guess, with some of my friends, a lot of it was the lifestyle, you know, my ex-wife

Wasn’t an adventurer at all. She was a couch potato homebody, I guess. You know, she liked to sleep. That was her probably. Favorite thing probably still is favorite thing to do. Haha

And I like to go do stuff. I’m an adventurer and Troy was an adventurer. He pushed it to the max. Yeah, he did. And so did all of us, it’s just I just got to where I couldn’t do that. I had to do that within the context of my marriage. Yeah. And you know it just got that’s just how it is though. Yeah. I don’t know if he ever, I don’t think he ever got married. I read somewhere though that he had a kid. Like, I don’t know when that happened but Like I said, I didn’t really talk to him for about, not on a regular basis for about Maybe 8 years, I don’t remember but then you know, he passed. And uh, it was really it made me cry. Pretty hard. Yeah, it really sucked. He was, he was 1 of my favorite friends. We had a death metal band together.

And uh,

Yeah, I dreamt that he was working in the shipping Department, he was like a supervisor or something and I had to Deal with him in some official business capacity but then he was like hey dude let’s go. Let’s go party! Like hang out and we did like we got like I don’t really remember, but I remember that. Like a bunch of women showed up and we had a keg

That was, that was, you know, how he was. He was the life of the party too. He was the biggest Happiest coolest. Guy there at any party.

And sometimes I really miss him. I think he was 43.

Yeah, when he died, it was. Was really sad.

Makes me wish, you know, I would have uh,

That I would have kept in touch a little better but like I said though his lifestyle and my lifestyle was very different, mine had to be mine, you know, I had to live For the most part, I had to live by my ex-wife’s lifestyle and that’s kind of how it is. But at the same time like it’s just it’s crazy to look back on how incompatible her and I were But,

Yeah but it doesn’t you know it didn’t matter because I loved her that much but blah you know, I don’t want to talk about that. I don’t really want to talk about a lot of stuff that I’ve been talking about anymore. That’s why I was just kind of like, you know. Oh yeah, the roommate. It’s not that I don’t

I don’t know like it’s not. It’s I I’m not really sure what to think about her. I guess she’s okay, you know, I just don’t know who she is like as a person and I speculate I don’t think she has a job. I think she’s Like I said, she reminds me a lot of Natalie and my ex fiance and I guess she’s just Reminds me of that.

And I don’t know, I’m going to get the kids this afternoon or evening, I guess it’ll be 7 oclock before I can get them.

But I don’t know. I still haven’t decided if we’re going to stay at the house. Or if I’m going to get a hotel room.

Gosh, I miss my kids.

I will have to get brakes for my car.

Yeah, I’ve got to do that, I’m going to do all that when I get back on night shift when I can like do stuff during the day,

Which is only, uh, Couple more weeks, yeah.

I think everything will be fine until then.

Well, it’s cold but I’ve got my coat.

And I do believe, I’m going to try, I’m going to park down there at the other part.

And walk in that way.

I’m just that way. I don’t have to see anybody. It’s gotten better though. I just, I don’t know.

I don’t know.

I don’t want to talk about that crap anymore either. What do I want to talk about?

Well.

I’m hungry. And the last few times I’ve gotten food from the racetrack, it sucked. So I’m not

I’m not going to deal with that. Yeah.

God like I just God damn it. You know. Like my fucking Talking and my voice and this app.

Tired. I’m tired as fucking hell.

Oh, it’s sucks.

It sucks so bad.

I don’t understand.

Maybe I’ll feel better after I eat.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think I’m going to give that guitar that Peter gave me to my kids. Yep. I was thinking about that yesterday at work. It’s like I’m just going to because you know, it’s a nice guitar, it plays really well but I don’t need it. And I’m going to go to the kids.

I don’t really know. What to think about Peter anymore? Yeah.

I don’t.

I think he’s a lot like Eric. Yeah, I’m not really sure what else to say about that.

There are so many people on this planet.

You think I would have found a girlfriend by now, right? I mean, I guess I haven’t been ready, you know? I don’t know. Like, just blah, blah, blah. Same old crap but I really do. Wish I had a girlfriend.

Yeah, I do.

And Right as I said that my 444 alarm goes off. I’ll I’ll show you.

4:44 AM
Hey.

Yeah, see? Hahaha

I said that right as in yesterday, it was, uh, I said that. You know, I don’t know. I’m not going to talk about that anymore. Yeah, okay. Well, I am really hungry and I’m still a good ways out. From food.

I’ve been practicing singing. When we were frogs on the way home, From work for the last couple days because I have the music recorded. It sounds really good. And I’m proud of that, you know?

Well, I’m excited for a weekend adventure with the kids. I’m going to be exhausted.

It’s going to kick my butt.

But hopefully, uh,

Well I’ll try to get them back home kind of early Sunday so I can Sleep.

And I have to do my chores at some point, Which just involves cleaning the bathroom.

I don’t know that 1 room mate, the 1 used to take me back and forth to work. She made a list like like the bathroom, chores, like cleaning. The bathroom has been my chore on and off the whole time. I’ve lived there and, uh, you know, I know exactly what to do and I guess in an act of like passive aggressive, bullshit she made a list for me. Yeah. So she said so if anything doesn’t get done, it’s it’s on me. Yeah, I mean, it’s on her. Yeah, that’s what she said. I’m just like, I don’t

Care? Haha Yeah, but that’s like that’s the kind of, I mean, I just, I don’t know like, bitch. Like I can just go off forever about my roommates. But ultimately, they’re not the worst people I’ve ever met. Yeah, I mean you know the boss lady roommate is she’s really awesome.

I just don’t really know about the new chick mostly because her dogs. And I mean, she’s like, there’s dog hair all over the bathroom, like she gets it on her butt or something and it’s all on the toilet seat. Like yeah I’m like dang girl you know, her room. Smells like dogs and incense like busty thick like a musty phucking fish like

What? Haha Ha Jesus No. Like it’s musty and thick smelling the couple times like this week that I’ve gone upstairs and she’s had her door open. It’s like, holy shit. And I just, I don’t know, you know?

Talking about the same old crap over and over. I’m just driving to work.

But I do, I really wish I had a girlfriend.

4:48 AM
Okay. Anyways, I don’t know, I don’t I don’t know what else to say. I’m just going to want to go in circles over and over and over.

And the app isn’t picking up anything. Worth a fuck.

Annoying.

It’s annoying. Yeah, thank you, please.