MONDAY OHH

4:22 PM
Oh my God.

Well I am I’m driving to work. It’s night shift and I love night shift so much.

Holy fucking shit at the traffic.

Oh, to get my other phone. For pictures? But it’s too late. Yeah, on the other side though, like Wow. There must have been some really bad shit happen. There’s like,

The. Oh my God. And overpasses too. It’s like all just jammed.

Like slammed with cars. Wow. You know for Huntsville it’s not like Los Angeles or anything or even Atlanta. God Atlanta is fucking

Atlanta is scary. Huntsville is really not that bad. Yeah, it might be the biggest city in Alabama now, but it’s not that big not compared to like You know, the big cities in America. It’s not like that. It’s just the biggest city in Alabama.

Well now, it’s like thinned out a lot. Not that much further up, it is. It’s kind of funny cuz Huntsville is it’s like it’s a small Uh, kind of got like a small Like a town Vibe kind of. Hahaha

Well, at least the part that I live in. Yeah, there’s like the other parts of it like downtown. I never go to downtown.

I Live 5 minutes from downtown though, if you drive. Yeah, it’s like Maybe a little further and uh but like where I live is kind of like a tiny little. Neighborhood. It’s kind of like a not that much different from where I lived in Albertville.

And the only time there’s a lot of crazy traffic is, uh, I think at the end of the day, like the, you know, 4 to 6:00 p.m. And I think probably, you know, 5:30 to, 7, or 8:00 a.m.

Well, that’s the whole fucking City, though. Yeah.

I don’t ever get out, that’s 1 thing. I was thinking to myself, earlier, when I went, I went to Sam’s Club up on the south side because the cafeteria the cafe there is, uh, decent the 1 off of Holmes Avenue is horrible. Oh my God, it’s so fucking bad.

And uh,

I was just thinking to myself, it’s like, you know, I haven’t gotten out and done anything the whole time. I’ve lived here.

It’s actually kind of funny.

I haven’t gone out to like, any, Any places at all?

I haven’t gotten out and played any open mic nights. That was, uh,

Something, you know, I don’t know. I just thought I’d have

Done a bunch of shit like that by now but all I do is work. And you know, the weekends I have money. I get the kids and the weekends. I’m broke. Which is this weekend. Um,

Well, I’ve still got to go. It’s my son’s last basketball game. So I’m going to go to that. I’m supposed to take him to that, actually

And, uh, I don’t know.

Hello, it’s already February. Yeah. Uh, January just kind of zipped by.

And I was really, really depressed and yesterday, I was, I made that post.

It’s like, dude, you know?

Me and my ex-wife have been, we’ve been split up for almost 8 years. You know, and it was it was horrible.

But it felt really good to get all that out. Because I never talk about her like that. I don’t know. I feel better.

But I don’t like talking about my ex-wife because she is so awesome to me now. She actually treats me like a person now and I don’t know. We just, we were so incompatible. It caused a lot of resentment. I think that um, I did I got on her nerves. I know that probably sounds stupid and it was really You know. But we were, we were just so incompatible.

But we made the 2 best people in the universe. And oh here’s the traffic. Yeah but like uh you know it’s okay. And it is though I still get like nervous around her like you know I just don’t want her to yell at me or anything because she has, there’s a few times that like we would be out like doing stuff with the kids like at uh, there was a an awards ceremony a few years back and I was being kind of an idiot and she was just like stop all you know the way she said it I just wanted to blow out my brains. Haha Yeah, and so, I mean, she can still affect me like that, it’s kind of funny but I, you know, I really do. Like care about her, you know, I mean, I could say that I love her but it’s not like a romantic kind of love. It’s like, I She was my first love though, and that’s that’s the thing about it. That’s what made it so traumatic for me.

Yeah. It’s like I mean I did I had like a bullshit fucking girlfriend when I was 14 that she cheated on me and you know, it broke my heart and I didn’t date in high school because of it. That’s that’s the kind of person I am. That’s how fucking sensitive and crazy. I am Okay. But, um,

Like, you know, That wasn’t anything like that. I really can’t count that that was just like that was like

I guess taught me a lesson or something, you know. That was a another reason I think why it took me so long after like I had to talk to my ex-wife for about 8 months. On, I see queue. Yeah, before I could work the nerva up, I see Q, you had it. No, I see Q. On icq. Thank you. Yeah. Arguing with this damn thing. Anyways, uh,

I still don’t understand why it fucks up the curse words. I’ll be like, fuk fuk fuk and shit. Shit shit. Shity shity shity bulshit.

Up my fucking ass. Fucking. Shit hole. It’s spelled shit like

Oh, it it fucking shit. It spells. Like really stupid, a lot of the time and I don’t know why.

And bulshit. Yeah, for some reason, it’ll start to spell it. And then it’ll change it to 1 L and I don’t know why.

It’s like the dumbest fucking crap. That’s the only thing though. Really that just drives me nuts about this app.

It used to not do that. I think it only started doing that a couple of years ago. Um, with an update or something God, I’m glad I left when I did. I thought about going by this Walmart up here in Madison and getting like crackers and but I have a lot of meat sticks. And I have about 40 dollars.

About 42 or 3 dollars and I’m probably going to have to ask my ex-wife for money again. You know. Always pay her back though.

I thought about selling 1 of my guns.

Or pawning. 1 of them, I thought actually about pawning my shotgun Saturday, you know, seeing if I can get like

100 bucks or something and do something with the kids Saturday night.

Because I’m going to be up there anyways and I get paid in 9 days.

Oh my God, getting paid every 2 weeks is fucking awful.

But,

I should have got those tires fixed.

I should have.

But I am happy to be back on night shift, man. I love night shifts so much.

But I hate the traffic like coming. Home. Is a it’s awesome or not, it’s going to work. It is fucking horrible.

The house is really different without all those other people.

And it’s yeah. Um, I had to go buy Han the dryer. Haha I had to go behind the dryer, um, earlier and reattach the dryer vent, uh, thing the, the Chute I guess.

And they had just been running the dryer for God knows how long without that thing attached. So it’s just been going all over the wall. Like those are, that’s those, are my roommates, okay? And she just said something to me about it the other day, like hey, could you go and check that, you know, and it’s like

Yeah. Yeah, I can and I did and I reattached it but I didn’t fix it that good because I’m going to have to look at it and I didn’t have time to fuck with it. And I’ve got to clean up the shower with bacon soda and peroxide because it’s not white enough for something. Uh, for the boss lady I don’t know what she’s got in her head about things but I’m back to my chores are sweeping and mopping the, the main floors and that is fine with me.

I think those were my chores before the the couple moved in. Yeah.

And then I have the outdoor stuff that uh the roommate guy, the furry guy left. Oh my God. I can’t I’m not going to get off on a rant about that. I have though. I’ve made those posts passworded, but it it’s not like he’ll ever read any of the stuff. Nobody, none of them ever react

Uh,

Hardly ever on anything I post on Facebook, but if they don’t look at my stuff,

I am glad that guy is gone.

Actually, I thought about

After a certain point, like just Blocking him. You know.

Where do I start, right? It’s just but it’s fine because he doesn’t live there anymore, and, uh, he was just an asshole. Like just a, a mean, selfish little asshole. And then, the couple were like, some of his really good friends and they were just stupid as fuck and inconsiderate. Yeah. And something happened with them and the boss lady roommate like something happened and they got the fuck out of there, and that was it. But then like, you know, that was my old room.

You know I didn’t have to give them that room and I wished I hadn’t have really but uh the roommate that took me back and forth to work. She got that room. She just moved into it and nobody said a word to me about it. It’s like on 1 hand you know it’s like I kind of would have took that room back. I would have liked to have at least been offered that room back. It just has a courtesy but then it’s like, you know, did I really want to move back in there? Uh, I mean behind those 2, fucking idiots. Like, I don’t know, I don’t guess it would have mattered but

It doesn’t matter, and I’m not going to live there forever either. I’ll probably live there. My goal is to save up. A bunch of money this year somehow. I’m I’m not doing a great job with that yet. But um, At least by the summer or something, maybe because I get another bonus in May. Uh I’ll have enough for a down payment somewhere.

Hell, just where I don’t have roommates. Yeah, I don’t really like having roommates. It’s not though, but then at the same time, it’s like it was the the couple and that, dude. Uh, that I didn’t. Like, I didn’t like those roommates. I love. Like the 2 roommates. I have now. Like they’re fine. You know we’re not really friends like they’re not my best friends or anything but They’re decent people. Yeah they are they’re not smart asses. Uh, you know, and they’re not fucking douchebags and that’s what just moved out. So, you know, it’s okay.

It just, I don’t know because I don’t that’s kind of the funny thing about doing that Farmhouse. I got so isolated, you know, from people and stuff and it was 1 thing to have co-workers and and have to get used to like, social dynamics at a job, which I’m just now starting to get, you know, I guess acclimated to that where I work. I mean it’s I’ve been there almost a year. It’s taken, you know, it took a good 7 or 8 months for me to get used to working there and the people around me and everything.

4:38 PM
But living with people is a different story. Yeah, it is.

And I learned like I well I didn’t learn I remembered yeah it made me remember because the last time I had roommates I was 21. And 1 of them was like my best friend Brandon and he fucking like me and him got into it over some stupid bullshit and it was mostly him. You know, he could say like whatever but he never communicated. He just kept everything in and pent up and, you know, and it would fucking build up and build up until he exploded 1 day and, you know, he didn’t communicate, it wasn’t really, you know? And I am, I’m annoying as fuck, but I’m not malicious, not with my friends. And uh,

It just

It was all it was all a bunch of pre-existing shit. Anyways, we had you know, been friends since second grade, you know, and we were just we got to be adults got out on our own and there was a lot of crap.

It wasn’t the first time me and him. Had got into it but we didn’t talk for about a year. And that wasn’t the first time that happened either.

And hell, I haven’t talked to him. You know, like they’re for a while. I did talk to him. Fairly regularly, but God, I haven’t talked to him in probably. Well, at least over a year.

Oh, like 2 years? Yeah, gosh.

And I don’t know, I think he just

I don’t know, I don’t know what he’s got going on, but the last few times I’ve tried to message him. He just acted, like he didn’t fucking really want to talk to me and that’s fine. It’s, you know, it’s okay. It really is

I’ve lost actually lost a lot of like, friends and stuff on Facebook. Like, I’ve noticed I had people but they still follow me on Instagram, but they blocked me on Facebook haha and I have no idea why. Nobody will ever you know, nobody ever tells you anything, but it’s people that I don’t really give a shit what they think. Anyways, it was

You know, it’s like It was people from the polyglot Community, a handful of them. I noticed. I’m not friends with them anymore and uh, some people that like like local like people that

You know, there’s no telling Because I have posted some pretty crazy stuff. The last. Well. I did like the first couple of years after the divorce but then I got better.

But then like after you know the Honda plant and Brittany and all that shit. I started posting crazy stuff again until uh you know,

I got this job where I’m at now and everything started looking up.

And until yesterday, yesterday was the first, you know, and Saturday after, I mean all that crap, though. But like that’s the first time I’ve been really that depressed. In a really long Time. Yeah. I mean it’s just,

This is going to be kind of a uh this is going to be a rough week I think

But uh, well it’s not going to be that bad. Yeah, I still got like You know, I’ve got enough money on my chime, I’ve got almost. Well, almost 3 quarters of a tank of gas. I’m just blabbering, you know, I left work, I left the house at like 15 after 4. And I’ve been on the road for almost 30 minutes.

Just blabbering. Going through, uh, you know, just stop and go traffic, but we’re out of Out of Madison, you know?

I don’t know, I think everything is going to be okay.

But I really do like, Um,

You know, I don’t know if we’re going to get any new roommates anytime soon or anything, but I am just perfectly fine with the 2 roommates, I have right now like they are just

It’s really nice not to have to deal with, like, You know. Uh, getting woke up at like 2:00 a.m. or at some weird time because, uh, that chick that I’ve talked about this. Yeah. The, uh, you know, 1 of them’s yelling at something they’re gaming or some shit, at some weird hour the whole upstairs smells like weed all the way up my nose and they’re yelling about crap. Or their Neglected ass fucking cat.

Was was like, mewing really loud about Some need, it wasn’t getting, you know, hahaha met? Or whatever

I guess the other guy though the dude, the furry guy, which I mean they I think they all 3 were but uh Like he didn’t really do anything like, except he took my heater, you know? I mean, I guess it was just shit like that. He, he wasn’t like, like actively, like, annoying or anything, but he would do dumb fucking shit sometimes. And, uh,

And he was just a general asshole. Yeah, and I actually saw him yesterday as I was leaving, I went to uh, I went out to get food again. And um,

I came back. Well, well, as I was leaving, like, all of a sudden there was like Him. And I guess his partner now, Uh, they were um,

Loading. They were like getting like I guess the old bed from out of there and I don’t know like the boss lady didn’t say anything to me. About any of that, she didn’t say like, you know, hey do you want to move back in this room now that they’re gone, she just got rid of a bunch of shit and fucking so I have no idea what happened but it’s like we were supposed to be getting another roommate too and that didn’t that didn’t happen. I noticed she removed them from the group chat.

And so like, I don’t know, you know,

But uh I don’t I was would have at least as a courtesy like to have been offered that room back or something.

But at the same time, I mean I just said all the stuff you know, it’s, you know, I’m not going to live there forever.

But it’s not bad, you know? I mean there’s way worse people out there. It’s just I’m glad they’re all gone because they were annoying as fuck and it made me remember that you know? Yeah people.

You know, there’s like just selfish stupid fucking people. That, you know, they’re just, they were just really immature and, you know, that’s usually and I ain’t going to say this but

I don’t know. I’m going to edit a lot of that out. I don’t really want to talk about this anymore, honestly, but I am getting closer to work.

Yes. And I think I’m going to stop in. At the RaceTrac gas station and get coffee.

Wow.

Damn, at the traffic.

Man, I’m going to get to work and I’m going to fucking go to the gym.

The whole another bunch of like Gym people. And at on night shift, And none of them freak me out. There’s this 1 chick though but she’s got, she’s married and her husband works in there too. So it’s like its it doesn’t freak me out. And I don’t know. I don’t know why it freaks me out so much because uh 1 of the that 1 chick the main gym, girl, who freaks me out, She is so beautiful and it’s like, why can’t I just talk to her, you know, but then that’s kind of what I was talking about in my last post. I’m I’m too screwed up and it sucks.

Just like there’s a chick who works uh just to line up from me. Um like the next line up from where I work, she’s like Really, really pretty and she stares at me all the time and I freak out about talking to her, too. I can’t talk to her either. It’s I have talked to her before though but just like I asked if she was on our Team

I accidentally sent her a friend request. I guess it’s been about a month ago now. But uh, holy crap, you know?

Did I also talk about how my Instagram, the my Instagram profile has got like 900 views last month?

Yeah.

I’m trying to think when I opened it. What? When I made it public again. I think it was like the second week of January. So in like, you know, in just a few weeks.

A couple weeks or something like it. Got 900 fucking views.

And that’s probably people from where I work. Now, my daughter’s friends, which I think is really cute. Haha And um,

It gives me like you know it makes me feel like not so retarded but I figured several quite a few of, those are probably Brittany too.

You know, I could be wrong but I just don’t think

I don’t know, I just Dang, there’s a fender bender.

I don’t think it was that bad though.

Holy shit. It is

450. So, I am almost to the RaceTrac

I’m going to get me some coffee.

Gas is shot up about. 20 cents.

Yeah.

Well, I don’t know. Maybe 15.

I’m going to get to see people like I’m coming to work. They’re going out. That’s all is how it is. Funny in the mornings it’s the same way.

Oh, I love my job though. I do I’m really really happy that I got the job. I have

I’m going to be right back because I don’t know that I am. Done talking, haha.

Oh, I did. I got a brunch burger. Oh, my God. I did. Oh my God. I’m so retarded and crazy. But I’m kind of hungry. I’ll plan it out a little bit better tomorrow. I know I had all weekend.

My credit score went up 20 points.

Oh, my Capo fell.

Yeah, they just made these brunch burgers or I wouldn’t have got 1. They made them, they put them out at 4:30. I am excited as I can be about it, honestly. They have my coffee uh creamer too. The oatmeal cookie. That’s what I like.

Ha ha ha. I am so crazy.

What was I saying though? Like my Instagram account? Yeah, I was I don’t know. It kind of made me like When I saw that and I can’t remember how I came to see that. Oh yeah, I made a link page. I did I made a Links Page, uh, For all my social media crap on this blog. So it’s like whoever looks at my blog can see all the rest of my crap. They can, you know, follow the links and see more of my crap and um Yeah, when I clicked on it to see it, making sure it works.

It showed me that somehow. I never saw it. Never noticed it before.

And Facebook made me like, Professionalize everything, I don’t know, it just defaulted to that sometimes last week.

But I have, I don’t know, my throat’s kind of fucking scratchy right now. I’ll talk a whole bunch and then I’ll just cough

Yeah. My ex fiance got into my brains. Um, earlier.

4:58 PM
Because I was looking up, uh, I was looking at fucking

Places. There was this thing that popped up, it was the oldest bars in America. And Wyoming was this, uh,

Cattle. Rancher and frontiersmen fucking Steakhouse or something. It was part of this like Old Fort Laramie. Part of the Oregon Trail which I took backwards with My ex fiance because she got into my phone and Turned my alarms off, right? Like I’m just reiterating, you know, it’s like for all anybody who just stumbles upon this, You know with no context. It’s like yeah. That’s why we drove across the country because I overslept and missed my flight back and it took a week about a week. And I lost a really good job, and Fucked up, College, blah, blah, blah. All right. But um, it was so funny because, you know, I had like, you know, my ex-wife and it does anytime I have to like anything be around her for some extended thing, like that, it it just makes me feel stuff. You know, it wasn’t as bad as back in October when I cried about her for like 5 days, straight my ex-wife. Yeah. Um, oh they must have just have gotten off work. The other shift

Anyways, I hope I get a decent parking spot.

But this time it just made me sad, but she was so awesome. And it was like, you know, why couldn’t she have been I just, I don’t know that. That’s just something that will never. I’ll never like

I’ll always.

Just feel like her I could have worked things out if she would have really wanted to. And she didn’t and I know she wanted something different. Anyways enough about that, though what happened? Why don’t I start thinking about my ex fiance? Haha Um, Like I was looking at that, uh, thing because we went through Wyoming and then, um, You know, I was just want to see where it is, because I was thinking, man, that would be so cool to take my kids to something like that. Because I’ve been through Wyoming, it’s not that far. I mean, it is, it’s a 20 hour drive But um,

It was so funny and then I just followed the interstate. It just like, I all of a sudden just started, I had this flashback episode, I know like yeah, that that happens, that happens to me and uh,

I followed the, uh,

The interstate all the way back up to uh, through Utah and Um,

Utah, right? Yeah, and I was just thinking like that was the next 1 over Idaho all the way back to, uh,

To Vancouver Washington and I just did, I had a moment and it’s like, coming back again. And this happened to me, For every year, like, like, around, like the, you know, the middle end of October, Uh, because we met on the 19th, which is my ex-mother-in-law’s birthday.

All of the 19s. Yeah. Anyways, uh,

3, 4 years.

Every bit of the first 3 years, I had it like after that happened and you know, 2019 2020 and 2021 I would have these insane flashbacks.

Uh, about my ex fiance that whole trip and everything. It was so crazy. You You were supposed to yield you, son of a bitch. Ah, these people, they’re leaving work, bunch of heathens. Over here in the assembly side. It’s like God, man. People have gotten literally gotten ran over.

Over here. Yeah.

And Wrecks. Oh, it’s just awful.

And then I’m behind somebody who’s just going super fucking slow. And they try to go around the speed bumps. But they’re not that bad, you know?

God people can be so dumb. I want to get To where I’m going. So I can eat my fucking brunch burger and this idiots in my fucking way.

He sure is a Florida Gator fan though. Oh, and it’s almost like they like they know I’m talking about them. Oh, there they go. There they turn off. Thanks asshole. I know people, you know. Sorry dude.

Okay, somebody else. Totally different person.

Oh well, listen so bad.

Okay.

Now, I can eat my food.

That was crazy because I never.

I never think about. My ex fiance, I never think about My ex fiance anymore really at all.

But it was kind of nice to remember her.

You know, a little bit.

Well, I guess that’s it. I don’t know. This is a long post.

I’m just glad I slept.

I got some extra sleep in today.

Thank you, please.