TUESDAY AFTERNOON

4:28 PM

Oh, traffic jam. Yeah, this is why I left kind of early.

I thought there could be a traffic jam. Ha ha ha. But I am driving to work.

I figure I’ll keep up my post streak, but probably not going to get taco Tuesday. I did not leave early enough. For that.

Taco, Tuesdays are a lot more realistic on day shift.

I don’t know, there’s 2 main places going to work where there’s traffic jams and that is right? As you get into Madison. And then, uh, The other place is right? Past the airport. Yeah.

Oh my God, though. Like what happened yesterday?

Last night, I guess at work.

I mean when when did we get off? Work at like 5. Yeah, this morning, it was so, uh, whatever. However you want to Define that last night, this morning.

Co-worker chick drama. Yeah. There’s that uh there’s that the super cute girl from work who has her own tag in my blog. Haha Uh she works up the line from me and she stares at me all the time and I always freak out like

She actually kind of reminds me of Brittany

She’s just the cutest little lady in the whole world and then there is the team leader chick. Who drives me absolutely crazy. And they moved her to another line several months ago. I’ve talked about her, like, last year,

I mean, drives me so fucking crazy. She does. But she’s also 1 of the biggest crushes I ever had. Yeah, like I haven’t talked about her in a while. Oh my God the first 2 months that I worked there.

It, it took it took 2 months, every bit of 2 months for me to get used to working around her, but I still really never did. She is so like, she’s like, Supermodel. Like actress beautiful. It’s fucking crazy. And uh, she’s real Slender and Like, Elegant, her hands Are so pretty like she’s like an elf queen or something, I don’t know. It’s just her ears. Oh my God, don’t get me started. Alright well she they moved her over where I am last night. She was working because 1 of the team leaders. Uh, the our main team leader. Guy had PTO.

And so, she was working around me last night. And so she got all up in my shit and I couldn’t, like, I just, I have to stare at her. I can’t not stare at her when she’s around, and it’s really funny because I’m so obvious about it. And, uh, it pissed off the super cute girl. And oh, my goodness, because I didn’t even look at her like all night. And she got mad and at the last quarter at the last break before the last quarter.

I fucking I was on this the really shitty process. And uh, I turned around it was right before break. And I saw her walking, from the restrooms and she just had this look on her face and she looked at me and then she just like, like turned and like, wouldn’t look at me and it was, oh my gosh. She was just projecting like

What’s the word, uh,

She was trying to make me feel like shit and she did it worked. It reminded me of Brittany so much. Yeah so I felt like shit. The whole last quarter and I was just like I’m just going to blow my brains out, you know, it’s the only fucking way out. Is to fucking kill myself now all these fucking crazy coworker girls but uh I don’t know it was kind of funny. Um, Like, after the shift ended and everybody was sweeping up, I, I I looked at her and stuff and I don’t know, she’s probably, she probably hates me. She’s probably going to hate me for a while because of that. But what’s so Funny is I never talk to anybody though. It’s not like I’m going to go home with any of them, you know? It’s not like, I’m like, but what’s so funny was uh, You know, after everybody left. And I was uh, getting the stuff out of my locker.

The uh the chick. The team leader chick, that drove me nuts. Uh she came up there and, she was like Hey you know and I was told her, you know great job tonight and all this Really. I mean I guess I was kind of flirting with her but uh and she showed me like this keychain thing. She bought. It was really cool. It was this dragon and then she had this other thing. It was like a manta ray. And she was showing me these things and I was like, did you name them? And she was like, oh my gosh, you know, I’m going to name them now haha and all this stuff and She left her badge in her locker which was right up above my locker. And um I mean they are just lockers anybody can get you know they’re like little cubby hole lockers that uh you can put your phones and your rest of your crap in your pockets and pretty much. This is the stuff that will fit in your pockets, can go in these lockers. But anyway, she left her damn badge. Uh, in the locker So I grabbed it and I run after I ran like A quarter of a mile, to catch up to her and like because I knew she was going to have to go, she was going to probably get to the gate and realize she fucking forgot it and have to turn all the way back around, which is I have seen her do a couple of times. So I was like, well I better run out there and Uh, but luckily she had turned around.

I don’t know. It was just funny. I gave her the badge. She was like, oh my gosh, you ran all the way, you know, out here. Just to give me my badge. It was like, yeah, I did. You know.

And, uh, I don’t know like I just sometimes I really wish I could just date her. But then, you know, there’s the super cute girl like I wish I could date her too. And then uh, you know, I think I counted up there as like about an 8 Ladies from work including the gym, girl? Yeah, I think the other gym girl, is married. But uh, holy shit, you know, like

I don’t I just don’t know what to do so I do nothing. It’s like I can’t like I would date her but then she would hate me and if I dated her, she would, they would all hate me if I picked 1 of them, you know. So, except the 1, I picked, but I just, I’m so fucking stupid. But, you know, I don’t really have a thing in common with any of them but I love them. Oh, I love them so much, I do.

You know, it’s not like at Honda where there were 3, there were literally 3 chicks at Honda, that were dateable. And Brittany was 1 of them. That was this other chick named Emily. And then this other lady who became my supervisor which was uh kind of funny.

And uh I don’t know like God damn here’s the other traffic jam.

No, this is still Madison. Yeah but I don’t know it was just It, it sounds.

It. I mean, it does. It might not seem like it was that dramatic but it was And I’m having a really hard time like talking right now, like,

I don’t know, maybe I’m dying. Yeah. The only thing that would make me sad about dying would be leaving the kids and not having a music career.

Those are pretty big things though, but uh,

I don’t know. Yeah, my voice has just been so fucked up lately and I find myself, like I get out of breath but then I ran and I ran my ass off last night. I think I just have allergies Yeah, like I didn’t really get out of breath running last night out to give her that chick her badge.

You know and I ran hard. Yeah, It was like Pretty funny.

Well, I don’t know what else to say. Brittany’s, been pecking on my blog, the other blog

And her. Massage therapist account pops up on the people. I may know all the time. And a handful of her friends, too. It’s kind of like well I don’t know what any of this genuinely means. But

Yeah, allergies. Right?

I think that’s what it is.

Oh my goodness and when I got home this morning fucking Pooty girl was there. Yeah, she was, I don’t know what the hell why she was at the house because the boss lady roommate already removed her from the group chat. And uh, I don’t know. I don’t know why she was there. I don’t know if she, uh, doesn’t have another place to go, or if something happened with whatever. Gosh, she got mixed up with

You know, from the looks of it to me, it seems like she just gets with guys because they’ll take care of her until they get either. They get sick of her or she gets sick of them and they fucking uh,

You know, whatever the hell happens. And like she has to do something else until she finds another 1. Yeah, that’s kind of what it looks like to me from her like Facebook and everything.

But I’m just speculating, that might not be. I don’t know though that pretty much does seem like that’s the case I don’t know why else she would have been at the house last night.

But I have to get out of there. Yeah I have lived there for about 6 months longer than I planned to do. I only planned to really stay there about a year.

You know, it’s it’s going on. I get my bonus in literally a month. About a month.

And so it’s, uh, yeah, it’s time for me to move on, but yeah, my throat’s all like scratchy and the fucking it’s been like this all year.

And it’s, it’s really gotten old, you know, it’s like, and my shoulder fucking hurts. Like hell, my neck and everything, my right shoulder.

I mean if it wasn’t for the kids, I would just kill myself. I don’t know. I would just fucking I don’t know why I’m still here except for that, I don’t know if I’m going to get a music career because my voice is all fucked up, like it’s it’s depressing. And I work all the time and I’m so tired, and I know I’m complaining. But it’s like, you know, what else? How else am I supposed to feel?

You know, I have literally never gotten to do what I want to do with my life. I’ve,  always been like, It’s either been some bullshit with my dad, or my ex-wife. And, you know, it’s not that I didn’t want to marry my ex-wife or anything. But, I could not for the life of me. Break up with her. And there were lots of different times that I knew. It was just killing me to be with her. I mean it was just it was But you know the kids are way better than I am and I think I had like a vision 1 time that I’m going to come back reincarnated as 1 of my daughter’s kids. Or something like that.

You know, I have no idea what any of this shit means.

I feel really stupid even talking about it, but here is My exit, and I’m just

Going to wrap this up.

Yay. Thank you, please.