5:11 PM
Okay, I’m just driving to work. It’s uh,
I’m almost kind of to work but I had Taco Tuesday and then I had a bunch of traffic and took a road, I shouldn’t have taken and then I ended up going past Walmart. So I stopped at Walmart and got SpaghettiOs. For the rest of the week. So I don’t have to spend ten dollars in the vending machine every night or at least tonight. That’s what I was thinking. I’m like I’ll you know I’ll fucking that’s 1 of those things. It’s like I’ll fucking you know I’ll go to Walmart tomorrow or something and then I just don’t. Yeah. But I made myself do it.
And that was good.
But uh, my body is adjusting, the 1, good thing. I guess I did for myself during the shutdown. Uh, last week was weaned myself off of Kratom. Yeah. That’s a long story but uh,
Like, I’ll take it for a little bit and then I’ll stop taking it and the withdrawals for me really suck because I used to be addicted to opiates. And my brain is already damaged from that? Um, which is another story, right? Yeah, I mean like that was 2012. Okay, but uh, Kratom withdrawals.
Um, they suck. They’re not, they’re not as bad by any means as awful as opiate withdrawals, but they suck enough. It’s pretty close. The first few days are really rough and I was taking quite a bit actually, like last month, but at the beginning of this month they made it illegal in Tennessee. So I just I was like, dang I’m not driving all the fucking way to Georgia, you know, to get this shit cuz I did that for a while too. Yeah, I know this is really shitty. This makes me feel weird talking about it, but it’s just, you know, that’s part of my fucking bullshit, too, I guess. My body like I haven’t had any in , 5 days. So uh, hold on.
Yeah, 5 days. I was counting them on my fingers. Haha
Um, so, uh
But anyways, I don’t have any plans to get back on it. I don’t need it though, but it helps, at least it makes,
Like it helps in 1 way and it fucks things up in another. I don’t know. I don’t know how to talk about it. It’s just I need to not do it. My body is still kind of adjusting to not having it because I took it for about a year. Straight. Like and I just my tolerance had gotten up so high that I was taking about 150. Uh,
Sometimes 200 milligrams of MIT a day, right? Yeah, that’s pretty awful.
That’s pretty bad.
So it’s like okay well you know and I could feel my liver would hurt and stuff it’s bad. And it’s crazy because me and my ex-wife used to actually fight about that because she took it and I was like, you know, but then I get, the long drives I started taking it when I was working here the first time, because I was driving an hour and 45 minutes every day to work, 1 way. So, all that was like,
3 and a half hours give or take of driving every day on top of 10 hours, sometimes a day at the car factory. So, you know, and uh, that’s also how when I developed a drinking problem. Yeah, it was bad. That’s like it was just too much, you know, and then working at Honda everything just got worse and worse but I’d get myself off of it and then you know I’d be like damn something would happen. Uh 1 time I got sick as shit and just instead of going to the doctor or anything, rational, I just got back on kratom. And, Yeah It let me like work through, you know, it was like taking hydrocodone cough syrup. You know? And I was like, Yay. You know, I was sick but it didn’t matter, so I was still able to work and that’s uh, I don’t know if I just thought about it because I had went, let’s see? I did it for a couple months at the First car factory but Then I got myself off of it because Fuck all the way to Georgia but when I first started at Honda uh you know, my body wasn’t used to that shit at all. It was a totally different kind of work that I was doing at the first car factory. And it hurt like hell, you know, And I started going to the gym after work. So I just took it it gave me extra energy And and nothing hurt really, you know like the soreness and all that stuff. It didn’t. You know, I guess I was kind of being a baby but um, you know, I finally, I weaned myself off that I took that for about 5 months. And I weaned myself off of it and then I got back all on it and that was 2022. Yeah, in May of 2022. And then I got I got off of it in October of 2022 and got back on it ij December. Uh, because I was, I got sick as hell and I was scheduled to work.
Like a couple of 12 hour shifts. I’d work a couple of shifts over and then I worked a double And I was sick as fucking hell and I had, I took that shit and I was uh, you know, I was able to work like all that extra fucking time and gave me a really gigantic Stupid paycheck that I spent all on the kids for like Christmas stuff and everything. So it was you know and then uh I think I got myself back off of it again that March And then I got back on it when uh, after the nervous breakdown. And I started the car seat Factory. Yep. And then I got off of it. That December. This is 2023 now. Yeah. Hahaha And uh,
Got back on it February of 2024 when they gave me, the Nugget meat machine job, which was the hardest job I ever had. And, uh, I was on it from there until Last year right before I got this job. Yep, and then, when I Got a Car, you know, I guess about a month or so after I got a car, I was like, you know, man, this shit because I had uh, had to get certified on this 1 process that hurt like hell that I’m used to it now, you know? But at the time I was like, you know, I was just like, I will just do it for about a month or so and then, you know, I’ll get myself back off of it and that turned into a year.
You know? So uh, yeah, here I am and hopefully though Because I realized that I could get it in Tennessee and that’s what made it like,
It was just way easier because Tennessee is only 30 minutes away. But now it’s illegal in Tennessee and Georgia is 2 hours away and I’m not fucking with that. I, I mean really, you know, and it’s I mean overall, I just I have to get back, I don’t need to be dependent on anything like that because if I didn’t take it, I would start getting withdrawals, real bad and that shit sucks. But I was able to wean myself off of it enough. Uh, I had got myself down to such a low dosage. By the shutdown week that and all the extra exercising that I have done and everything. You know that helps too. Anyways I just got myself off of it but my body is still adjusting to not having it. And uh I was feeling really, really awful this this afternoon when I woke up it was like I don’t know, I woke up really early and then went back to sleep about 2. And got up at like 3:30. And I was like, God, I feel awful. Oh, I feel so awful. Well, I was just hungry, you know? Haha and I needed to eat And so I ate uh, Taco Tuesday and now I feel great. You know, so it’s like I’ve just got to get used to that again. It’s, it’s probably going to take the rest of this week to get used to that shit. And it’s great, I feel great. And I do have have mood swings when I take it it’s like it it’s all dependent on how I take the stuff, it’s just like being addicted to anything else even though it’s a baby compared to like real opiate addiction, it still fucking sucks. Yeah, so anyways, that’s what uh, I was just glad to get that out. I tried to make a post about it earlier but I was in my room and
Yeah. Well, I’m almost to work. You know, maybe I’ll have enough time, I can do the gym. For a little bit and then, uh,
Yeah, I had You know, maybe everything will get better, it’s just going to be It’s going to be kind of rough this week. You know.
That chick that’s been in my brain’s. Uh, she wasn’t in my brains.
Earlier and then I got on Facebook and the very first thing I saw in my feed was she had posted in the what’s happening in Huntsville group and I almost commented on it and then I was like, well I can’t think anything to say, You know, really, that would be funny and then after I thought of something I couldn’t find the post and I’m like, you know, That’s probably for the best. Yeah, it’s just 1 of those things, you know?
But it is. Stupid hot. Like, oh my God, it’s so stupid. Fucking hot.
I’ve been stuck in traffic for the last 30 minutes. And, I don’t know. I’m just ready to get to work and do the gym a little bit. Try to get back on the fucking. Track with All the stuff. Yeah. Haha, yay.
Thank you, please.
MY BLOG NUMBER SEVEN 