3:41 AM
Okay. Well, I am Getting ready to go to work. I mean, I’ve got
Plenty of time before I have to go. But uh,
Oh my gosh, I’m just
Tired. I’m really, really tired and I’m not looking forward. I’m not looking forward to the bullshit of this week because everybody is going to be
Sad and tired and angry.
There’s a part of me though that feels like my life has been a lot harder. Than it’s had to be like than it should have been it’s like really this is what I have to do this. And it really started when I got into business with my dad, it was like, why do I have to do this? But I couldn’t, you know, I couldn’t have Lived with myself, if I hadn’t You know, it’s like I would have felt like a gigantic piece of shit, the whole rest of my life if I never would have done that. And now I’m just exhausted, you know? I mean just like
So it’s a big reason why this job pays so much is because they wouldn’t be able to keep anybody if if
If they didn’t. It’s really ridiculous. Uh,
I’ve just never been this tired at all, I mean I have but it’s when I worked like 80 hours a week, you know. Or like the fucking, uh, when the 2011 tornado hit and we were We were, you know, working. I think I worked 56 hours straight without a break and then I got like 3 hours of sleep and went got up and went right back out. It was uh,
You know I was tired then, you know. But like now it’s just like but it’s over and over and over, it’s drug out for the last year or so, and I’m like dang.
Yeah, there’s there’s no real work life balance or anything. It sucks. I just feel like that’s all I do is work and
Complain, you know and lay around
And when I’m not working I’m just like God I’m so tired and I sleep. I’m so fucked up that I’ll sleep like You know, 4 or 5 hours at a time or something.
I don’t know. Uh, at least I’m not broke, I guess.
And other news, um,
Just talking about dreams. Um, like I had another crazy dream I made myself. Go to sleep. I guess it was about 11:30. Maybe I think I fell asleep before midnight and woke up about 2:00. And uh, I had a dream about that chick who is Who was in my brains for like, all of a month. And I haven’t really that kind of faded.
And then I had a dream about her and I was like, dang. Yeah, I just still can’t bring myself to send her a friend request or something. I just can’t but you know, I wish I could. I wish like I could Something, you know, but
I just, I don’t know.
And in that dream, it was crazy because uh, we met in a video game, I was like we were playing some crazy video game, it was a mod of never winter nights. Yeah. She was like a fairy or something. And I was a potato. And then we like figured out who each other was and we met in the parking lot of Publix. And she said Oh there’s my potato! And I was like, oh gosh, and it just kind of went from there. Isn’t that silly? Yeah, that’s dreams. You know I was like, wow, I can’t believe you play never winter nights, you know, but she was like, yeah. I love that game.
On.
I’m such a loser. I know it feels like it is. It’s like God, what? A fucking loser bunch of shit. To fucking have in your head all the time. You know, I don’t get anything real, I don’t it’s that’s what’s so funny about it. I get to you know,
Um, I thought about going and practicing my music and stuff, but 1 of the reasons why I leave so early in the mornings on day shift is because of traffic.
Traffic is a piece of shit.
On day shift all the way around. It’s great on nights when you’re going home. You know, at like 4 or 5 a.m. because nothing is happening in that direction but in the other direction, it is And, There’s a huge difference. Between leaving at 4:30 and leaving at 5:00 a.m. you know or 5:30 or any later than 5:30 you are fucked. So it’s like dang Yeah, oh and this app isn’t picking up anything real.
What am I saying? No, I mean correctly.
Really well, I don’t know. My brains are so fucked up.
Holy shit.
I think the best sleep I got. Was yesterday afternoon? Yeah, I think when I woke up at like 7:00, I’m surprised, I was able to make myself go back to sleep so easily because A lot of times, uh, on the transition weekend, You know, if I wake up at 7:00 or something that you know at night I’m up the whole rest of the night, you know it’s really stupid but I feel. Okay, right now I just drank A bunch of coffee and I am going to make more coffee. And then I have to stop and get more coffee for the rest of the day. And, uh,
I don’t know, I still didn’t fill out my team leader stuff, but I don’t. I just, I don’t know. It’s like a whole another can of worms. I don’t really care about I would have to care about this job.
I don’t think so though. Really you know, I was just thinking about the team lead chick that I had a huge crush on that pointed out. Uh which were friends and all like I added her on Facebook and she’s really cool. I just, you know, I just don’t think we would make a good couple. We’re really, really different. We don’t have anything in common but um, you know, she was a space, cadet from hell and She was a team leader, they let her be a team lead. So, Yeah, I mean, I figured
Like I said, everything will be okay.
But I need to fill that out and get that finished up this week. If I have the energy if I don’t, you know, That’s the thing. I don’t really have a lot of extra energy. I did really good to go over my set. Once you know, I practiced it last night. That was, was that last night? No, that was yesterday morning, you know. That was like 4 or 5 a.m. And uh I have got to get the kids this weekend. I mean it’s just it’s so ridiculous. I haven’t seen them in a month.
I don’t know, I don’t really know what else to say.
I really do. Wish I had a girlfriend though. It sucks. This is the longest I’ve ever gone without any kind of Like anything at all.
No, I mean, of course. You know, most of my adult life. I had my ex-wife. I didn’t have anything at all until I was 19. So, Whatever. That’s like dang, I sure am just Going to waste in that department. Hahaha
Yep.
Thank you, please.
