6:59 PM
Oh my goodness. Yep, I am.
I just ate. Sandwich.
A sandwich.
I just got home and made a sandwich, but I went, uh, After work work was just like, oh my gosh, it’s the It’s rotation week, you know, it. It sucks going from nights to days and the gym girl. Came up on the line uh second quarter. And I just, oh my God, I about had a damn nervous. Breakdown is what almost happened? Yeah, but you know I love her like the most out of all the girls there. The gym girl is like she’s like an angel fell from heaven. She really is and I don’t know what else to say about her. She’s just I freaked out and ran away too many times and I’m afraid she hates me. And if I try to talk to her, now she’s going to be really really mean to me. And it just the conflict from that. You know, is just it’s more than I can handle and that’s why I freak out even more and run away from her even more. And why I won’t go in the gym. If she’s in there, and if I go in there and I see her, I freak out and run away. Like visibly. It’s kind of funny, but it’s not, it’s torture. It’s fucking a living. Hell is what it is. And I just think She is 1 of the sweetest, most beautiful ladies in the whole entire universe. I don’t know what else to say. I mean she’s perfect you know
But that freaks me out too because she was not supposed to look back. I’m like, what the fuck? What is? Why would somebody like you? You know, want a fucking like, oh my gosh, do you even have? You have no idea, you know, and it’s like,
But I’m also just plain. Damn, I’m afraid to fall in love again, you know, that’s it. More than anything. And I wasn’t ready. And now that I feel a little more ready. Uh I just it’s like dang I sure did freak out and run away from her a lot, probably the worst out of all of them and But she’s the 1 that I would really like, seriously, consider dating, you know what I mean? So, whatever. I just, I love her personality. She’s got so much energy, and she’s so happy seeming and she cares about people, you know, she wouldn’t be doing the job she has. And, uh, she’s just a really beautiful person all around, and I guess there’s a part of it. It’s like
She could do better than me. Yeah. That’s uh that’s that’s a lot of that. I know I’m really good-looking and I’m a lot of fun to watch at work but uh you know I’m twenty thousand dollars behind on child support and a bunch of other crap. That’s really Stupid. So,
Yeah. I guess she couldn’t though do any better than like as far as like the love Department goes like as far as how much I would love her and how I would treat her. You know. But uh,
That didn’t matter with with um, Any of the other ones. Hahaha So, I mean shit. Yeah I wasn’t good enough. That wasn’t ever good enough for anybody else. So why would it you know it’s really awesome at first that’s 1 of the things it’s like yeah. And then you know, after a while they’re like well you know,
Your credit score and, uh, All this other crap, like that’s how my ex fiance was too, especially. She was like,
Finances. You’re a fucking mess, dude. Like fuck you. She was so mean to me about that. I guess I have a complex about it because of my ex fiance also, it was so crappy, though. She was she was way meaner to me than my ex-wife ever was. I could say that like Hannah Was the only chick who treated me worse than my ex-wife. But my ex fiance did too, she was She was a whole lot worse than my exwife. My ex-wife was.
I guess I don’t want to talk about that anymore. Yeah, I’m just
Yeah, it just it really hurts, though, to see the gym girl because She’s the gym girl. Yeah. She’s well, you know, she’s a woman. I don’t know.
I just call her that she’s probably in her late 20s. Early 30s.
And she is, she’s just the most
Beautiful, lady Around that place. Yeah. Um but anyways. So uh I left work today, that fucked me up the whole rest of the day that practically ruined the whole rest of the day for me. And it was visible to everybody everybody around and all the girls on my line they stare at me and watch me and watch who all I look at and they get mad and jealous and it’s crazy. And it’s a that’s another reason. I don’t really talk to co-worker girls because, you know, they’re just real drama oriented. And I mean shit it’s a it’s a car factory. Everybody does the same thing over and over and over and over. And uh a lot of times, that’s the only entertaining thing is drama.
You know, and there’s a part of me that thinks that’s all that is. What that dude. Maybe He’s just you know being a
Being dramatic that he’s not really.
Maybe he’s really not that awful and you know, outside of work. Yeah, I don’t know.
But I totally I said it’s just like dang, you know, I totally uh
Gosh, I really wish I could have been different. Like I really wish that I could have just been like hey, you know you wow. No way. You like me to too? You want to go on a date? You know, like I don’t know why I couldn’t have done that but
Jesus Christ, she is she’s just the most beautiful. Sweetest lady I’ve ever seen in my life, honestly. You know. Anyways, uh, but I left work and I went to the Publix that I usually go to. And the 1-off Winchester. The last couple times I went to it. It hasn’t I haven’t been it, uh,
I would rather go to the 1 that I um what is that? Even that 1 at its in um, It’s close to.
Its off Oakwood. I think but it’s like Oakwood. Like, way up off Oakwood. Um, close to the Oakwood College. Yeah, I think it’s you got to take 255 to get to it and uh, I don’t know, I guess it would be the same. Wouldn’t it be the same Oakwood Avenue that
I don’t know, let me look that up real quick.
Oh I guess I don’t know. It kind of like you have to go up.
I think on Sparkman and then it like,
Goes through some stuff and then turns back into oak wood. I don’t know.
But uh, That isn’t it all folklore.
Yeah, uh, but it’s off Oakwood.
Maybe it’s off old Monrovia. Okay, it turns into
Fuck, I don’t know. Okay, but I guess technically, the address is on Old Monrovia. But anyways, I went there and I got some because I have started to put myself on a bland diet Because I’ve been having a lot of problems with acid reflux lately and it’s been fucking with my voice. And that’s what’s been fucking with my voice The last 6 months.
And uh,
Holy shit. So I got some heartburn stuff, some ant and acid. What Acid reflux medicine. And I got, uh,
It’s just because I, I mean, I drink so much coffee and I do eat A lot of spicy foods, I eat. Um, SpaghettiOs. With hot sauce. Dumped all in it, every day for lunch. It’s uh,
That and, and all the coffee. And um, just
Yeah, so I got some stuff to help with that and I’m going to stop eating crap and I’m trying so hard to not drink as much coffee as I usually do.
Who knows how that’s going to go, right? But uh, I’m going to try not to and then
Everything will get better, but I saw this chick who I’m friends with on Facebook, but I never met her in person. She’s like a little local musician. She’s a lot younger than me, though. So, you know, I don’t really look at her like that but, uh, you know, romantically right? And uh, but she her little dude cuz they’re in their early twenties. Like I don’t think she’s 23 or 24. And they were there At Publix. I got behind them in line and I was like, Hey, that girl looks familiar and it was like, holy shit that’s her. And I didn’t say anything though. I didn’t want to freak her out because I’m really like out of it and sleep deprived kind of and just totally stupid. So, I didn’t want to like weird her out or anything, haha but I couldn’t believe that’s who it was. And I just got right behind her in line. And that like not on purpose either. I was like, Hey, that Line’s open and they were just blam right there in front of me. Yep. And uh, so that was kind of funny and then I went to the Guitar Center And got me a little practice amp, but I’m fixing to try it out as soon as I edit this and post it and uh, It’s like 160 dollars. It wasn’t, you know, it wasn’t that bad at all. I’m like, really excited too is a fender. It’s a fender something, but, uh,
It’s like a Fender Mustang something amp. It’s but it’s got like Um,
Like a little digital interface and It’s it uses. Uh, you can use software with it and shit. I’m really excited. I’m fixing to open it up and look at it and then go out into the garage and practice it and I got that. Uh, so I can price guitar and then I can use my little speaker to sing through. And I’m really, really excited. Super duper excited to do all that shit here in. Uh, as soon as I can peel my ass. Up out of the bed and do it after I edit this and post it. Yeah. Yay. Thank you, please.
